Feedback?

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Sun, 2012-05-13 07:52

Feedback?

They tell you its all same
Or do they just play games
With your heart, with your head
Be honest with yourself chivalry’s dead
You’re beauty when it fades
Like all that fades away
Won’t be taken lightly
By your lovers nightly
Don’t say no
They all know you will go
Because you are that girl.
You are that girl
That girl who wears her reputation on her sleeve
That girl who make’s kept men leave
That girl who no one will ever respect
That girl who is racked with regret.
Am I supposed to show sympathy to you?
Am I supposed to say sorry that you ruined my life simply because you had nothing to do?
The only thing I can apologize for is you’re shitty sense of self worth
Not to mention the fact that you’re screwing around with the guy I had first
Do I miss him you say
You whisper it’s the jealousy that made me this way.
Jealousy, ha that’s funny!
I was done with him a long time ago honey.
Enjoy yourself while you can because the worst feeling in the world
Is gonna be when you lose your man to That Girl.

Sun, 2012-05-13 09:00

lavadis

Hi Lost If you would like to get feedback on your work, the best way to do this is to comment on the work of other writers rather than post your work to the forum. If you comment on my work for example you will suddenly find that I comment on this and many of your other postings.

Sun, 2012-05-13 09:07

scratch

Lavadis is right Lost. This whole process is based on reciprocity, get involved in the best way by reading and commenting other members stuff. Welcome and good luck.

Sun, 2012-05-13 11:13

Richard L. Prov...

Hello Lost, The above comments are good advice. Remember, you must write from the heart, and therefore you have a good start. Read, read and read some more, and comment on what you read, and the writing sky will be clearer. All the best, Richard LP

Richard L. Provencher

Sun, 2012-05-13 12:41

lavadis

Lost - Scratch, Richard and Stan are incredible contributors to this site - you will see them commenting on many many pieces of work - always constructively. This is a very diverse site but the contributors are very friendly and welcoming - the more you put in, the more you will get out and the benefits are immeasurable - I have completed a novel fuelled by the incredible support of the members of this site.

Tue, 2012-05-15 23:21

Sooz006

Personally I always comment on twice as many as I post. This is my way of doing it. It's simple maths, comment on two, post one. I always comment on somebody who has been good enough to read and comment on mine. Give and thou shalt receive.

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