Nude calendars

I have no wish to appear coarser than usual Jon (some would same I'm OTT already), but in the general scheme of things sales of 'nude' calenders depend on the size and amount of tits present, and the desirability of the bodies they are attached to. Now whilst I realise that your calender is presented as a 'literary' version, the presence of said tits, and maybe a few bums, is what is needed to ensure good sales figures. Perhaps you would be so kind as to give us a 'tit count' before we commit our hard-earned five quid to this project.

I'm also intrigued as to how it's possible to impersonate said subjects without any clothing, unless you intend to rely on scenery. Will Titania be showing both her tit and her ania? Will Harry Potter be sporting pubic hair or will he be pre-pubescent? Will Hamlet be smoking a small cigar as he plays an air on his G-string?

Put me down for a couple, Hen. Um...calendars, that is, not tits...

put me down for a couple of tits, I don't have anywhere to hang a calender at the mo ..err, I'll have one flat one, two round ones and a packet of nipples

Well, we're all young, the women are hot....and, according to my sources, the men are hot too. I'll do a tit count when we finish faffing about with the artwork, but, generally speaking, parts that would cause Boots to withhold are photographic film have been stealthily concealed. There's one with only blue paint covering ladies' blind cobbler's thumbs, but we did that on digital. How are they impersonating literary characters? Well, Titania has faery wings, and is sitting next to a man with a donkey's head, D'Artagnan is wearing a hat and waving a sabre around, Hamlet is contemplating a skull, the Little Mermaid has a fish's tail...and so on and so forth. And no, Harry Potter is not pre-pubescent. Thanks, Andrea - hopefully printing will begin soon!

hell, why not...can you send it in a plain brown envelope please....:-)

hen, can the queen of the fairies have the sabre and d'artagnan have the fairy wings in my copy please? excuse me for being so awkward

May I have the stealthily concealed bits blatantly revealed on mine please.

can i also have in my copy missi as that chap from Lady Chatterley's, the woodcutter ?? please

*sidles into thread* errm...could I have a ....errm ..... packet of chewing gum please.

okay, one last request hen. can i have hoxtoneye in a brown overcoat with ankles exposed as that character played by Lawrence Harvey (was it?) in Room At The Top? pleeease ... go on

Joe Lampton

blimey that was quick, thanks flash go on hen...

May I have Tan draped over Tony Dee as well?

Mississippi, Excuse Me but as far as i know neither of us are literary characters so that doesn't count!!

Sod it!

i could be the wife of bath 'tho, maybe

That would make you several hundred years old Tan.

*removes brown overcoat to reveal......................... brown cardigan* [%sig%]

Fwoar! *looks Hox up and down and swoons at sight of.... corduroy slippers*

Perhaps it was the way you said 'bollocks' Tony.

and yes- i now see you beat me to it- wow fast reader :-)

Oh Goody.. goody.. yess aill ave one Can't wait to see all those young bods in their prime... and especially YOU young Henstoat! Tell me.. what colour wings will you be wearing now?

I...err...don't get to wear any wings. I do get to wear leather gloves though.

*swoons*

*spoons*

*spews*

It'll look good in the office - make us feel we're mechancis! Put us down for one- and put Gardiner down for ever if you have half a chance.

Oh go on then. But I expect class, as befits erudite literary persons, not cheap student rag-mag porn! [%sig%]

*gasps* Well, swooning is terribly tiring...

Oooh, Matron! *spanks*