EdwardYIrving

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I have 7 stories published in 3 collections on the site.
My stories have been read 3232 times and one story has been cherrypicked.

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Edward Y. Irving

My stories

Strait, in "The Parable, or a Very Subtle Joke

He was on the bus, the Route 3 provided so graciously by the Government for exclusive student patronage, and Strait was bitching about how annoying the rest of the children on the bus were, with their incessant yelling, mindless projection of everything from food to jackets to schoolbags from one end of the bus to the other, and the crude mind games they played with pedestrians. These never seemed to give the kids the entertainment or satisfaction they so sorely sought, as they persisted unperturbedly in shouting obscene phrases, words or suggestions at unsuspecting victims; or holding sheets of paper to the window with mobile numbers written next to rudely scrawled pictures of genitalia; or ' Teddy's personal favourite ' drenching people, particularly cyclists as they rode alongside the vehicle, with water, or some other, less appealing liquid.

The Final Trial of Our Hero

They came in the night. They always came in the night. This particular night, the police broke into Our Hero's small cottage, shook him roughly awake, and placed him under arrest. It took some time for Our Hero to realise what was happening. 'What's all this about, then?' he asked indignantly from his bed, after the two constables had burst into his room and sprung on the light. 'We've got some orders, to be placing you under formal arrest,' replied the tall, amiable-looking bobby who stood in the doorway, while his partner went through the rest of the small abode, turning on the lights and generally looking around. 'I'm afraid you'll have to come with us right away, sir.' 'Hang on, don't I have the right to be told what I'm being arrested for?' 'Oh, I'm sure you do,' laughed the bobby. 'I'm sure you do indeed. Personally, I'm not sure why you're supposed to be under arrest. All I've been told is to come out 'ere, get you, and get you on back for the court to deal with you. Just one minute. Hey!' he called out to his partner. 'D'you know why we've got to bring in this fine young genteel man here, then?' There was no response from the other room. The bobby did not appear fazed.

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