290.02
This is fun to do in a sad, blokey sort of way. Simply read the list of offences and, if you've done it, award yourself the 'fine'. Tot up the total and post it here. You don't have to admit to specific peccadilloes, just put the number. If you think anything has been left off this exhaustive list, feel free to add it, along with a suggested financial penalty.
feigned vagrancy – £25
stole a relative’s heart medication – £10
throttled a wren ‘in an act of clemency’ – £15
invented rollerskates – £6
barrelled into a courtroom all tatty and mud-stained yelling ‘Stop the trial!’ – £30
ate pornographic magazines – £1
impersonated an interventionist deity – £10
impersonated an interventionist deity whilst having sex – £50
fired icy jags of lightning from your fingertips, shrieking – £8
autographed a glockenspiel – £20
lied to a stenographer – £25
started a novelty restaurant chain whilst drunk – £5
ran amok in Sweden’s parliament – 30p
blood-smeared grin and the rest is blackness – £100
vomited – £1
vomited into a top hat – £60
vomited into a top hat then produced doves and a rabbit all pukey, your audience horrified, weeping openly – £120
genuflected before a flickering neon Christ – £30
Geoffrey – £21
banged through planes of existence, your face a gleeful frightmask – £15
snarled at harlequins – £5
bored acquaintances with your ‘hierarchy of tubers’ – £60
weeping, foetal, it is impossible, it is impossible… – 2p
~It's a maze for rats to try, it's a race for rats to die.~
The All New Pepsoid the Second!
Share your state secrets at...
http://www.amerileaks.org
Share your state secrets at...
http://www.amerileaks.org
~It's a maze for rats to try, it's a race for rats to die.~
Share your state secrets at...
http://www.amerileaks.org