200 worder from Mikey H

ta jude, I took on some of your suggestions.

Hi Mikey, I'm a big fan of 200 worders. The version of 'The Unusual Kindness...' that's up now is 196 words. Is that after taking on some of Jude's suggestions? I had a look at it and saw how you could an extra twenty of so words to play with, mostly by taking out things like 'I felt' and the like, trusting the reader to grasp that as a first person narrative, only the narrator could be experiencing something. If you'd like to see my suggestions, I'm happy to post them here or email them. They're a good thing 200 worders. Cheers, Mark

i loved the first sentence, the image of the pavement really works, as do the short sentences throughout. Excellent, a really satisfying read. Juliet

To be honest, I'm not overly bothered that it is 196 words rather than 200. Should I be?

Mikey, You don't have to be bothered about it at all! I was just thinking of the way that I write 200 worders. To me, the rule is strict. It must be 200 words, no more no less. I love this because makes me feel like I am pushing up against an absolute end, making the challenge seeing just how much I can fit in before the curtain falls. Doing this means that I go back and edit a lot, excising words, collapsing sentences, joining ideas etc. This becomes a struggle to nip off a few words here and there, winning me an extra three, or four or five words which I then have to use to add as much value and richness to the story as possible. I suppose I like it as an exercise because it teaches you the value of words. Each word, properly chosen, can contribute a huge amount to a story. Usually, by the time there's about 175 words, I find something else that adds an extra layer to the story or a new theme. So, the absolute wall at the end, 200 no more or less, seems to make me really work on ideas, reducing them like a stock or sauce. You know, throwing in a huge pile of ingredients only to simmer and cook it down to a very small amount of intensely flavoured, wonderfully rich sauce. But that's just me. Cheers, Mark

dude. loved it. as an ex-tooting resident i wonder if there's someone called Mikey I living in Clapham. Take it easy man. Mikey G

thanks mikey, Mark, mine is a totally different creative process. I come up with one line (in this case, 'The day I fell over in Balham') and then write from there, not caring if it is 200,300, or 500+ words. This one happened to stop around the 200 mark, so it became a 200 words story. They are sort of little creative explosions for me and I tend not to edit them after (unless someone has a really great suggestion or I made a mistake). I did another one http://www.abctales.com/story/mikeyh/rise-and-fall 201 words I'm afraid.

Would prefer to see it titled something along the lines of "Falling Over In Balham". This title seems to just repeat the end sentiment. Like "midnight loop the loop" very much btw.

Hi Mikey, I'm on your wavelength regarding the creative process. Editing for the sake of a word count would be too prescriptive from my liking although I guess we're here to pick up new ideas and ways of thinking. I liked the "pavement up my nostrils" bit. This has different levels, both metaphorically and literally, as you might have bits of muck up your nostrils after a fall. I also liked the "pool in my mouth" part. Drinking tea suggests the moving (consumption) of liquid whereas a 'pool' suggests still liquid. To me, this antithesis implies that something is wrong. Perhaps the person is in shock due to the fall and cannot even carry out the simple process of drinking tea.

Congrats on story of the week! This is what flash fiction should be - completely without plot, but strong images that leave the reader satisfied. I do like Mark's approach (and Jude's), though, with the pre-set limit - shaving words here and there, adding a few elsewhere - it's quite an exercise. foster.