Hydra

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I have 0 stories published in 0 collections on the site.
My stories have been read times 26 of my 125 comments have been voted Great Feedback with a total of 27 votes

Time for a change I thought. So, I've reverted to my original user name from another site and another era. I've cleared out all the old work and I'm starting again with a blank page.

26 of my comments have received 27 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

Totally original, extremely

Posted on Mon, 18 Jun 2018

Totally original, extremely wicked and hilariously sharp. Really well written and I couldn't help smiling when I got to the end.

Possibly a bit wordy in the second paragraph, e.g. A sigh escaped his slightly parted lips...why not just say...

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Posted in The Love Addict

1 Vote

Cracking story. Well thought

Posted on Sun, 17 Jun 2018

Cracking story. Well thought out, well paced and well structured.

I think if you read it aloud you might find a couple of clumsy sentences and a spell and grammar check might get pick some typos. For example:

'Finally, my feet...

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Posted in End of the World

1 Vote

An observant story Drew. I

Posted on Sat, 16 Jun 2018

An observant story Drew. I got the impression the narrator was not happy being made to comply with the needs of his siblings. Good on him I say for making a stand. But now he has to make a choice between getting out of that situation and living...

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Posted in Choose One Cake Only

1 Vote

Hi TK. It's a good story with

Posted on Sat, 16 Jun 2018

Hi TK. It's a good story with a believable narrator but I did find it a little confusing trying to work out what was going on. Maybe you should try and shorten it and make it simpler. Did you need all the stuff about the insurance man for example...

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Posted in Grace Part Twenty.

1 Vote

Agree wholeheartedly with the

Posted on Sat, 01 Jul 2017

Agree wholeheartedly with the sentiment.

Any chance of a tune to go with it?

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Posted in Just coping (Song)

1 Vote

Cherries must be on ration if

Posted on Fri, 13 Jan 2017

Cherries must be on ration if this wasn't given any.

Every picture perfectly painted like a modern day Pathe newsreel.

And not first person to boot.

I have no cherries but I award you a sherbert flying saucer.

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Posted in Breaking the ice

1 Vote

I found your original and

Posted on Fri, 02 Jan 2015

I found your original and refreshing use of vocabulary - it worked paricularly welll with the poem's staccatto rythm. I also liked the little details (e.g. the Bowie reference).

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Posted in new year

1 Vote

The thing is Jesus (I can

Posted on Sun, 03 Aug 2014

The thing is Jesus (I can call you Jesus can't I?) This is actually rather good. But it makes for shit reading. If this was a book I'd have binned it before line 2. But the dialogue is definitely film material. It's quite pacey - like being...

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Posted in Johnny Incest: P.I. (Part 2 of 2)

1 Vote