If you have been following my Steak Pie saga (which can be found here and here ) it may have occurred to you, as it has just to me, 'What the dickens was the waitress doing in the kitchen all that time after we ordered our mythical steak pies?' In the absence of any facts, I've done what anyone else would do in the circumstances, and made something up: Waitress: "Oh my God, Oh my God, you've got to help me!" Chef: "Calm down, whatever's the...