scratch

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I have 0 stories published in 2 collections on the site.
My stories have been read times 205 of my 4,721 comments have been voted Great Feedback with a total of 223 votes

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205 of my comments have received 223 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

Wow.

Posted on Thu, 11 Dec 2014

Klep (tomaniac?) seems tormented and driven.  I hope that these monsters that he's creating are ultimately found to possess enduring goodness despite such horrific physiological and spiritual alchemy that he has imposed.  Then again I'm...

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Posted in Shadow Cooking

1 Vote

A story dominated by the

Posted on Wed, 10 Dec 2014

A story dominated by the centrality of the male ego.  Perhaps attempt one that doesn't subscribe to chronic gender stereotyping?

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Posted in the marriage

1 Vote

Smooth and, as far as I can

Posted on Tue, 09 Dec 2014

Smooth and as far as I can see flawlessly written.  Is this the start of something longer?  There are four characters already, discounting Hamzas' line manager and that suggests this is going to run.

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Posted in The Devil's Dish Served Six Different Ways (chapters 1 & 2)

1 Vote

What was the cause of his

Posted on Sun, 07 Dec 2014

What was the cause of his egocentricity and anger?

 

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Posted in How to control temper

1 Vote

Those truks are very very

Posted on Mon, 01 Dec 2014

Those trucks are very very spooky Andrew!  I loved this, would really love to read some of K's own thoughts.

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Posted in Green Trucks Carry Everything at Night

1 Vote

Holy moley Tina.  Brilliant. 

Posted on Tue, 02 Dec 2014

Holy moley Tina.  Brilliant.  Love the use of the seen text at the end.  Really very very good.  Bloody excellent in fact.

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Posted in Breaking Glass

1 Vote

This is almost technically

Posted on Wed, 26 Nov 2014

This is almost technically flawless.  Really strong narrative that put me right in the place.  

Perhaps consider the action tag here:

"Of the friend of my childhood, my strong right arm.  See here.’   Alexander indicates the body...

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Posted in The Garden of The Gods

1 Vote

I love this!

Posted on Sun, 16 Nov 2014

love this!

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Posted in 'the mad wind'

1 Vote

Consider the first four and a

Posted on Sun, 12 Oct 2014

Consider the first four and a half lines and the last four and a half.  It's good enough without them.

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Posted in Sticks and Summer Rain

1 Vote

A dull travelogue?  I don't

Posted on Fri, 10 Oct 2014

A dull travelogue?  I don't thinks so if it's written in the style of this, with grounded philosophy and acute juxtaposition of people, place and self.

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Posted in Reflection

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