you become depressed, so depressed, it's surprising how down and out you are. you thought you could handle it, that it would never end, but whatever does not kill you makes you stronger.
I thought I was free the leaves of a tree, falling the natural pendulum, descend stairs of air. Over and over, the seasonal vase breaks, colored boats of pedals once watered,
Sometimes, I feel blind, like someone who cannot see himself, only others unless... so not completely there. A part of me lives to see the other part die, only laughter issues,
it doesn't seem so meaningless any more, my past, years and years of searching for ways to bandage myself, listening to the crazy voice in my head, doing the wrong things,
I know you are a part of me, sometimes I am afraid so terribly afraid of what you might do what you might say, you are so angry with the world, so deaf to messages of love, you are crippled,