Insertponceyfrenchnamehere

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I have 17 stories published in one collection on the site.
My stories have been read 263285 times and 170 of my stories have been cherry picked.
422 of my 9,781 comments have been voted Great Feedback with a total of 425 votes

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422 of my comments have received 425 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

this is looking better too!

Posted on Mon, 31 Mar 2014

this is looking better too! One more tip (and it's something I always do): in the dialogue, once I've written it, I always go back and make sure I've abbreviated things in the way one would if one were talking - I've, it's etc etc. It makes...

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Posted in The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Three

1 Vote

ha - made me laugh! I always

Posted on Sat, 05 Apr 2014

ha - made me laugh! I always wonder where you get your plots from...

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Posted in Larry and Mick Get Frozen

1 Vote

The dialogue in this part is

Posted on Thu, 03 Apr 2014

The dialogue in this part is much better! The only bit I found slightly hard to believe was here:

 

“Yes, it is not looking good but if there is one  thing we can take from this it is that we seem to be heading for a planet that can...

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Posted in The Labour Planet A Working Title Part Four 1118 words

1 Vote

I'm still really enjoying

Posted on Mon, 31 Mar 2014

I'm still really enjoying this - and i see congratulations are in order for being pick of the day! I have one tiny suggestion for this part:  the dialogue at the end, between the woman and the man is great - very authentic, but the conversation...

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Posted in The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Three

1 Vote

what a fantastic opening

Posted on Sat, 29 Mar 2014

what a fantastic opening chapter - I'm very much looking forward to reading the next part!

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Posted in The Labour Planet - A Working Title - First Draft

1 Vote

Hello - this was very

Posted on Tue, 18 Mar 2014

Hello - this was very readable, it has a nice easy flow to it. It is quite slow moving though, and i think it could be improved with a good edit - maybe cut it down by a third or so? Welcome to ABC!

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Posted in All my creation - chapter 1

1 Vote

This is very well done. I

Posted on Mon, 17 Mar 2014

This is very well done. I like the use of repetition, and I think the ending is a good one. It would definitely be worth going through this again with your spellcheck: your English is fantastic, but there are some adjustments needed

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Posted in Lucky Number Seven

1 Vote

Albert, why don't you put a

Posted on Fri, 14 Mar 2014

Albert, why don't you put a clickable link to your novel on here - and also in the forum? I'm sure you'll get more of an audience that way. good luck!

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Posted in ONE GOOD TURN

1 Vote

"As far as the adjective use,

Posted on Sat, 04 Jan 2014

"As far as the adjective use, all of my writing tends to be heavy on the imagery, and the idea of taking it out makes me feel like the story/writing won't be 'mine' anymore, if that makes sense. Do you think the "prose" detracts from the story to...

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Posted in August Shadow (working title): Prologue

1 Vote

Welcome to ABC Venegas. I

Posted on Sun, 15 Dec 2013

Welcome to ABC Venegas. I enjoyed reading this - you have an easy writing style. I hope you'll post more soon. As you mention specific people and places quite often, you might want to change their names, given the nature of your writing.

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Posted in Our Meeting

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