VeraClark
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I have 7 stories published in
0 collections on the site.
My stories have been read 3382 times
and 11 of my stories have been cherry picked.
321 of my 3,326 comments have been voted Great Feedback with a total of 326 votes
Read one of the 135,854 stories from our 20,089 authors
The pace of this accentuates
Posted on Thu, 17 Sep 2015
The pace of this accentuates the words beautifully, in places it is resurgent and then reaches a crescendo of uninhibited expression. Homage, indeed. Has echoes of Baudelaire's Fleurs du Mal, too.
Read full commentPosted in Homage to Mr. Ginsberg
This is so apt and carefully
Posted on Mon, 14 Sep 2015
This is so apt and carefully arranged. That flower, that single human, how easily crushed but how esily helped, too. Worked with unaccompanied asylum seeking children from the point of dispersal - straight from lorry to hostel. All those one acts...
Read full commentPosted in Poem For a Flower
This is really good. Shifting
Posted on Wed, 09 Sep 2015
This is really good. Shifting perceptions for your reader, mix of ghostly and surreal, the level of fine detail I tend to expect of your work.
Have deliberated if it should open: 'It was starting to rain when I arrived home that...
Read full commentPosted in Smudge
Hi Jesse, it's an interesting
Posted on Mon, 07 Sep 2015
Hi Jesse, it's an interesting read. Some lovely metaphors and descriptions.
Difficult to follow without paragraph breaks. Perhaps you could put those in?
Think you could cut Adolpho's detailed character description - height, clothes...
Read full commentPosted in The Funeral
Beautifully done. Could read
Posted on Mon, 07 Sep 2015
Beautifully done. Could read a book of your poetry. It's such a lightly handled piece for the displacement and loss inside.
Read full commentPosted in Stockholm archipelago
This is lovely -
Posted on Sun, 06 Sep 2015
This is lovely - contemplation and self analysis at the cemetery. The internal struggle interrupts half way through and pushes the picturesque poem out of the way, just as anxiety often does. I hope you post more often.
Read full commentPosted in In a cemetery.
It's a vaccum, the hospital,
Posted on Fri, 04 Sep 2015
It's a vaccum, the hospital, an exclusion that even seems to slow thought down. There's a life inside there that you don't give a second thought unless you're admitted and you can't help noticing finer details, going back to the smaller world you...
Read full commentPosted in In Windows
Ed, this is really absorbing.
Posted on Thu, 03 Sep 2015
Ed, this is really absorbing. I love the 'phone conversation and the description is quick, moves you along with crisp detail. May I make a suggestion - would it work if you started with 'Number 47 was suffering. The paint had peeled..' It drops...
Read full commentPosted in Repo Part 2 (Jason's last Repos)
This is full of fast pace and
Posted on Thu, 03 Sep 2015
This is full of fast pace and sounds are so real, the dialogue blasts out, it builds up fabulously in sensory overload. Not sure about the ending - the 'dream' ending but is it a dream - feels cliched and I think you might be able to strengthen...
Read full commentPosted in Dreamwars #1 Dani and the kermit ship
Such beautiful language,
Posted on Tue, 01 Sep 2015
Such beautiful language, spins you along with such richness and detail, it feels like a sensory experience just reading it.
Read full commentPosted in Relic
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