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| Story | Lucky For Me | Kilb50 | 8 | 8 years 6 months ago |
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| Story | The Road to Nowhere Special - Chapter II | J. A. Stapleton | 2 | 8 years 8 months ago |
| Story | The Magician's Assistant | hilary west | 9 | 8 years 10 months ago |
| Story | Devil's Breath | Philip Sidney | 8 | 8 years 10 months ago |
| Story | Foss | Philip Sidney | 12 | 8 years 10 months ago |
| Story | On Not Seeing the Northern Lights | Philip Sidney | 13 | 8 years 10 months ago |
| Story | A celebration of austerity | Terrence Oblong | 10 | 8 years 11 months ago |
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| Story | Revision | Philip Sidney | 23 | 8 years 11 months ago |
| Story | Leggings a ring reforged. | maisie | 4 | 8 years 11 months ago |
| Story | New Year Text Message | love_writing | 7 | 8 years 11 months ago |
| Story | With the Mother of all Headaches... | Silver Spun Sand | 27 | 8 years 11 months ago |
| Story | Completeness | Ama_G | 3 | 8 years 11 months ago |
| Story | a dowry | celticman | 12 | 9 years 1 week ago |
| Story | Potential | EB | 19 | 9 years 1 week ago |
| Story | Walk About a Bit | Bee | 21 | 9 years 1 week ago |
| Story | What do grown-ups mean by a ‘short’ walk? | Rhiannonw | 6 | 9 years 2 weeks ago |
| Story | Love Cats | celticman | 20 | 9 years 2 weeks ago |
| Story | Why a secretive society is an unhealthy, unhappy and dishonest society | well-wisher | 2 | 9 years 3 weeks ago |
| Story | Long Night's Journey into Day | Silver Spun Sand | 13 | 9 years 3 weeks ago |
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| Story | January | Rhiannonw | 20 | 9 years 3 weeks ago |
I liked the narrative here.
Posted on Sun, 18 Jan 2015
I liked the narrative here. The dense internal rhymes and alliteration create some punchy rhythms and the metaphor of the running with wear and tear of experience is an interesting one. I think this is a poem that would sound really good being...
Read full commentPosted in Once, We Were Runners
Now that's a healthy comment
Posted on Thu, 08 Jan 2015
Now that's a healthy comment section! Hi. I really liked the story and I like that the ending has a nice partial resolution.
For me these phrases are a little odd and you might rejig them in the redraft.
'Paul screwed his eyes up. A...
Read full commentPosted in A Bowl of Water Falls
I like the way the promises
Posted on Thu, 01 Jan 2015
I like the way the promises build up slowly with separated 'I will's then tumbles down in a flurry of 'and's. Well done Bee.
Read full commentPosted in New Year's Revolutions
a pretty dull rock
Posted on Wed, 31 Dec 2014
Wow Parson. This was surpirisingly interesting. It sort of begins as a ramble but I have to say that I really enjoyed reading it. As a reader it doesn't get much better than that.
Your poem 'Tweed' (I think) was my favourite piece that I...
Read full commentPosted in New Year Thoughts of a Simple Man
Sharp, focussed storytelling
Posted on Sat, 20 Dec 2014
Sharp, focussed storytelling here - well controlled prose.
Read full commentPosted in 25 Years After
I like the structure and the
Posted on Fri, 28 Nov 2014
I like the structure and the style which is 'tough', direct and concise. Good show on the cherry.
Read full commentPosted in Kevin Smiled
Wasn't there a competition
Posted on Thu, 04 Sep 2014
Wasn't there a competition with the theme of 'Joy'? If there is, I think you could definitely extend this (if extension is necessary). It's a really well structured narrative. I cannot overstate how much I appreciate your 'proper' stories. This...
Read full commentPosted in Joy
I'm going to be honest and
Posted on Wed, 27 Aug 2014
I'm going to be honest and say that this isn't for me, but it is really clean and tough and cold. It's definitely a skillful piece of writing. I like that the clinical language matches the content.
Read full commentPosted in Spit Out the Bugs in Your Mouth
Too mad for me to analyse so
Posted on Fri, 29 Aug 2014
Too mad for me to analyse so I'll just say that you don't need the quotation marks in a script. This looks strangely familiar. ;)
Read full commentPosted in The argument with a chap who thinks everyone is a clock: Part 1
I really like the poem. I
Posted on Tue, 26 Aug 2014
I really like the poem. I think that the abstract expression in the first stanza is a little distracting, But I think it's great from stanza 2 onwards.
Read full commentPosted in Strummer on a late summers' day
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