Part of a series inspired by names of (very) small towns in the United States

String If she holds her arm out to him and says it’s the length of affection he will ask if it’s the same with string. The parcels she gives him, are not hearts in brown paper,

Julian sucks a Chicken McNugget and shrugs

This year, in order to save on Valentine’s Day guilt, Why not put some effort into your indifference? Show her you really don’t care With a KFC bucket and warm can of Tizer.

Truth has no obligation to set you free. You don’t get to pick snowboards over shackles just because today’s reality’s the wrong flavour – that’s not how truth works.

7) You surely laugh more (don't you?).

The figure of her was there standing at her door, just as it had been there almost 13 years before. Only she wasn't really there, she'd long since moved away

Today, I have brought with me my striped black t-shirt which is inappropriate for the weather. I saw the sun shining and was mistakenly transported to a warm summer's day.

I have not brought with me my flashy new ipod. For fear of the hoodies on the bus pinching it. I have not brought with me the wind and the rain, which were beating down on me when I reached the Richard Attenborough Centre.