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A good start! I like the way
Posted on Sun, 10 Apr 2016
A good start! I like the way it jumps all over the place (in sync with the character). Do post more soon
Read full commentPosted in Vodka
A very interesting idea!
Posted on Sat, 02 Apr 2016
A very interesting idea!
Read full commentPosted in Another time Another Place
I didn't see that coming!
Posted on Wed, 30 Mar 2016
I didn't see that coming! This might work even better if you drew it out a bit - spent more time on the hunt for the man, perhaps even his history. Very well done as it is though!
Read full commentPosted in Scarlet sunrise
couple of typos in this:
Posted on Fri, 25 Mar 2016
couple of typos in this:
look pass the bed
look pass the person
and also I'm not sure about a la chacun - shouldn't it be chacun a ses besoins etc?
Read full commentPosted in Caffeine Supernova, #1
Typo: it's Jackson Pollock
Posted on Sat, 19 Mar 2016
Typo: it's Jackson Pollock
also I think Warhol used soup cans, not beans
Interesting piece - thank you!
Read full commentPosted in Today's Art Scene
I will be looking forward to
Posted on Sat, 12 Mar 2016
I will be looking forward to part two as well. You've done a good job with introducing different aspects of what looks to be an interesting plotline.
About the tenses: the best thing would be to find someone to read it through - or read it...
Read full commentPosted in Searching for Change ch.1
A lovely positive message!
Posted on Sun, 21 Feb 2016
A lovely positive message!
Read full commentPosted in But Honestly
Brilliant story! (I feel a
Posted on Fri, 19 Feb 2016
Brilliant story! (I feel a bit sick now though)
Read full commentPosted in The Everlasting Pie
A very honest piece. A sense
Posted on Wed, 17 Feb 2016
A very honest piece. A sense of disassociation from the world, lonliness and frustration.
If you'd like feedback I'd suggest you lose the introductory piece in capitals. Perhaps add it at the end (but not in caps - that looks quite shouty...
Read full commentPosted in I awoke today. A Physical Sense Gone, How Did I Get Here?
Awful how words can destory
Posted on Wed, 17 Feb 2016
Awful how words can destory someone isn't it. If it's fiction, it's very convincing
Read full commentPosted in BEST DAYS OF YOUR LIFE?
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