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I have 70 stories published in 2 collections on the site.
My stories have been read 44277 times and 24 of my stories have been cherry picked.

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My stories


D'You Think That Captain Birdseye Is a Wanker&;#063;

D'you think that Captain Birdseye is a wanker? D'you think he sits there stroking all day long? D'you think the little fishes Given four and twenty...

Family Recipe

Take a hairy testicle and put it in a pot (Or place it in a saucepan if a saucepan's all you've got) Then boil it up for half an hour and add a touch...

Every Toenail Tells A Story

A textbook for would be burglars

E: It All Ends Somewhere

It all ends somewhere. The bedroom, the car the pub The cemetery. It all ends with drama or a whimper Tears or rage But it all ends somewhere...

F: The last bit

The light was on in my bedroom upstairs. It hadn't been when I left, I was sure of that. It had still been daylight when I left. I edged closer to...