The Chronicles of Bulgaria

Whimsical descriptions of episodes in my life as an immigrant living in rural Bulgaria.

Frosty the Snowman

I was going to go out to the garden and build a snowman but then I remembered that I needed to put some fat on the cat’s abscess. I haven’t been...
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Devil Gate Drive

Between our village, Malki Chiflik, and our capital, Sofia, the road cuts its way through the Balkan range of mountains, assisted by several lofty...
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The Merry Moth of December

I think that in a previous life I may have been a moth. Although I’ve never eaten a woolly jumper or bashed my brains out on a car windscreen, I can’...
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Haemorrhoid Android

As long as I have known my dear Priyatelka, she has radiated great warmth and kindness. She is a charming woman who loves life, adores children,...
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A Hot Little Model from France

The kitchen took on the appearance of an overfilled Greetings from Murmansk snow globe as the door flew open and in gushed a torrent of winter’s...
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I Fought the Law

Apart from having a wee behind a bin down a back alley in Middlesbrough when I was eight years old and a tiny bit of embezzlement around six years...
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Story of the week

Rakia Maria - Part One of Two

I love the month of March in Bulgaria. It heralds the beginning of a four-month long explosion of nature straight off the back of the iciest winters...
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Rakia Maria – Part Two of Two

So I said to Priyatelkata ‘Isn’t it lovely?’ and she replied ‘Yes! It’s very lovely.’ Maria added, ‘Life and health!’ in Bulgarian, of course. What...
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Scorn Not His Djezve

A tongue in cheek assessment of the misnomer that making good coffee is complicated.
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Lingo Bingo

An explanation of the labour of love of my life that may have started out a long time ago as a labour of clinging on to my life.
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Johnny Ten Levs

Johnny’s always drifting around, trying to find, alcohol.
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