Singles Ads I'd Like To See (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Sometimes I'll rummage through the singles ads, because some of them are rather hilarious.

Beauty Defined

The fine golden hair, White shiny teeth, Hourglass figure, The definition of beauty, With eyes as blue as the sky, Full, luscious lips, Strong legs like that of an athlete,

The Mirror's Reflection

Daunting, Naked I stand, Giving myself to you fully, I surrender, to your critique, Illuminating my fat thighs, exemplify, my imperfections,

Do Something Different This Bank Holiday

Bank holiday time again..

Elysium (part one) : Sara’s Awakening

Sara wakes up in a snowy void, she does not know how she has arrived here. She meets an esoteric snowman...

An Invitation to Dinner (after Catullus 13)

He wrote some good stuff... I haven't! Picture is of the bust of Catullus at Sirmione. Source is Wikipedia Commons.
Cherry

The Love Surgery with Alan Shearer

This was a piece I wrote for a university writer's workshop that was on Valentines day of this year. I went for a somewhat Haruki Murakami vibe. It's quite surreal I guess, hope you enjoy!

A Helping Hand

The second part of the Gable short-stories. I had the idea of turning these into a Graphic Novel one day. Hope you enjoy reading.

The lonely sock

Steve had been with Cindy for as long as he could remember, they were the perfect couple, a matching pair of size ten black socks with the finest of navy blue stripes.

Divine Union

When I was young I had a dream.

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