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322 of my comments have received 327 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

I liked the pulls and drags

Posted on Fri, 13 Nov 2015

I liked the pulls and drags of this, how the setting soothes.

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Posted in Home

1 Vote

Wonderful use of a very

Posted on Fri, 13 Nov 2015

Wonderful use of a very fitting analogy. I hope all's well in your silvery world.

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Posted in Joyride

1 Vote

Hi cassis, it's nostalgic and

Posted on Sun, 18 Oct 2015

Hi cassie, it's nostalgic and very candid. A thoughtful response to the brief. I would consider taking 'meandering' out as bit cliched and 'had'  on line 3 could go for smoother ride.

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Posted in End of the road (Poetry Monthly)

1 Vote

I think the narrative stream

Posted on Fri, 16 Oct 2015

I think the narrative stream works as a child's distraction very well. I think you could take the double 'no no' 'yes yes' out and have singulars without it affecting structure. More natural. I'd be inclined to take more out - make your reader...

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Posted in In ver ness (Poetry Monthly)

1 Vote

What a super piece. Dark and

Posted on Tue, 27 Oct 2015

What a super piece. Dark and light.

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Posted in Some days begin with a swim

1 Vote

This is really sweet.  I feel

Posted on Wed, 21 Oct 2015

This is really sweet.  I feel the ending needs more welly... that last line feels it should be a crescendo ending rather than a fine one but that may be my impression.

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Posted in discord to harmony (revised)

1 Vote

I really like how this

Posted on Tue, 20 Oct 2015

I really like how this condenses so much and doesn't lose depth in the economy. The narrative voice has the hindsight of maturity in it - and gets more cynical towards sister as you go.

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Posted in 'Go Now'

1 Vote

Mythical and gorgeous

Posted on Sun, 18 Oct 2015

Mythical and gorgeous escapism

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Posted in Oyster Bay

1 Vote

Deeply moving. It must have

Posted on Thu, 08 Oct 2015

Deeply moving. It must have been painful to write. The time - a true gift - and ways it will be spent precious.Beautifully conveyed.

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Posted in “The joy of an Indian summer*”

1 Vote

A Russian Doll journey within

Posted on Wed, 07 Oct 2015

A Russian Doll journey within a journey. Told with such love and bold colour.

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Posted in Stepping Stones (Poetry Monthly)

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