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2388 of my comments have received 2439 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

This is very well done. I

Posted on Mon, 17 Mar 2014

This is very well done. I like the use of repetition, and I think the ending is a good one. It would definitely be worth going through this again with your spellcheck: your English is fantastic, but there are some adjustments needed

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Posted in Lucky Number Seven

1 Vote

Albert, why don't you put a

Posted on Fri, 14 Mar 2014

Albert, why don't you put a clickable link to your novel on here - and also in the forum? I'm sure you'll get more of an audience that way. good luck!

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Posted in ONE GOOD TURN

1 Vote

"As far as the adjective use,

Posted on Sat, 04 Jan 2014

"As far as the adjective use, all of my writing tends to be heavy on the imagery, and the idea of taking it out makes me feel like the story/writing won't be 'mine' anymore, if that makes sense. Do you think the "prose" detracts from the story to...

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Posted in August Shadow (working title): Prologue

1 Vote

Welcome to ABC Venegas. I

Posted on Sun, 15 Dec 2013

Welcome to ABC Venegas. I enjoyed reading this - you have an easy writing style. I hope you'll post more soon. As you mention specific people and places quite often, you might want to change their names, given the nature of your writing.

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Posted in Our Meeting

1 Vote

Hello Enemy - welcome to ABC.

Posted on Fri, 06 Dec 2013

Hello Enemy - welcome to ABC. I'm not a fantasy fan, so you should take it as a compliment when I say I found this very readable. You write with an easy fluency, although it would be a good idea to have another edit to remove some typos. I will...

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Posted in Last Words...

1 Vote

..... a very nicely paced,

Posted on Wed, 16 Oct 2013

..... a nicely paced, well-rounded peice. I enjoyed it very much.

One tiny suggestion: for authenticity, I think they would have used the word "wireless" instead of radio then. 

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Posted in The Appointment

1 Vote

Hi Maddi - you said all

Posted on Sun, 13 Jan 2013

Hi Maddi - you said all comments welcome so .... first "Fred woke with a finish" ... not quite sure finish is the right word here More generally .... I enjoyed reading this, but I think it needs some rearranging. It's quite odd that you don't...Read full comment

Posted in Just Starting: Part 1

1 Vote

there's something different

Posted on Wed, 02 Nov 2011

there's something different about the style of this, compared to your usual - what do you think fatboy? It's very good, and I really like it - it just seems unlike you (not in a bad way)Read full comment

Posted in I Can't Help Wishing Christopher

1 Vote

I like this very much

Posted on Thu, 09 Sep 2010

I like this very muchRead full comment

Posted in The approach of winter

1 Vote

That was really good

Posted on Wed, 30 Dec 2009

That was really goodRead full comment

Posted in Safety Information

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