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Great to see this developing.
Posted on Thu, 02 Nov 2017
Great to see this developing. There is a lot of exposition in this part, and for me following drafts could do with breaking it up a bit. But that's for later. Keep going!
Read full commentPosted in The Eden Sky - 3 - An Auspicious Day
Some great ideas in here - I
Posted on Wed, 01 Nov 2017
Some great ideas in here - I was going to wiffle on about a bit of proof reading, then realised you're doing it for Nanowrimo so you won't have time for any of that at the moment! Hope it continues to go well.
Read full commentPosted in The Eden Sky - Part 2 - Old Friends
Very sorry for your loss, and
Posted on Wed, 18 Oct 2017
Very sorry for your loss, and hope that you have many happy memories for this special day.
Read full commentPosted in The Big 7-0
Really interesting the way
Posted on Thu, 12 Oct 2017
Really interesting the way this deals with memory and recall. The bit where the mother insists that there were always birthday parties, flatly contradicting the memory, and causing the narrator to doubt it. I like the way things aren't neatly...
Read full commentPosted in Yellow Ribbons
Yes, the words whip around
Posted on Mon, 09 Oct 2017
Yes, the words whip around you like that fresh, blustery wind. Lovely work.
Read full commentPosted in Nordy Bank Fort 5/10/17
I really liked the structure
Posted on Fri, 06 Oct 2017
I really liked the structure and flow of this, Rhiannon. It reads very well. There are some bizarre interpretations of all sorts of things out there. Whatever one's own particular religious views, some of the conspiracy and end-of-world...
Read full commentPosted in False Announcements!
Great that this appeared on
Posted on Thu, 28 Sep 2017
Great that this appeared on National Poetry Day - it is a great poem. I'm doing a course at the moment on 'creative non-fiction' - which turns out to be a lot more complicated than making 'what I did on my holidays' more interesting - and this...
Read full commentPosted in Flying Ops
Our homes really do contain
Posted on Sun, 24 Sep 2017
Our homes really do contain the layers of our lives. I loved this. So visual, and also a ghostly feeling of the hidden past. Great writing.
Read full commentPosted in DIY
Really liked this, Rhiannon.
Posted on Mon, 18 Sep 2017
Really liked this, Rhiannon. The rhyming works really well, and parts of it reminded me of riddle poems, which fits in with the idea of the wise owl. It's a wonderful idea, that we could have a wise and perceptive companion who could keep an...
Read full commentPosted in Watch your back!
It's interesting how poems
Posted on Sun, 17 Sep 2017
It's interesting how poems take different people different ways. I thought it was very clear, but in a very subtle way. I think you have to stay true to your vision, especially as it has struck a chord with a number of readers. That's the...
Read full commentPosted in time travelling
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