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StoryHow Long Can You Stew For, Before You Fall Apart? Jane Hyphen76 years 3 months ago
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2689 of my comments have received 2779 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

I have to say I agree with

Posted on Mon, 18 Jun 2018

I have to say I agree with Scorpio on this - it is a brilliant idea, and the action is nicely balanced from start to finish. Very much worth fleshing out the characters, and perhaps adding some dialogue. It could result in something really...

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Posted in BAIT

1 Vote

There's some nice observation

Posted on Sat, 16 Jun 2018

There's some nice observation in this, and the dialogue is well spaced out and believable. I really wish I could say that the plot so far is rubbish, and that no adult would behave in such a way - but instead I just felt very angry after reading...

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Posted in Choose One Cake Only

1 Vote

The passing on of things - it

Posted on Thu, 07 Jun 2018

The passing on of things - it's a rite of passage, and simply and beautifully expressed here. 

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Posted in Here Are Things

1 Vote

I have never heard of wind

Posted on Mon, 28 May 2018

I have never heard of wind turbines (?) referred to as rumplestiltskins before. They look so graceful and other-worldly for a distance, don't they? Some wonderful imagery in this poem Di

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Posted in renewable

1 Vote

Nicely done drew

Posted on Fri, 25 May 2018

Nicely done drew

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Posted in In the Next Breath

1 Vote

made my head spin by the end!

Posted on Thu, 17 May 2018

Very clever. Made my head spin by the end!

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Posted in Anachronistic Harry

1 Vote

I hope there's more of this

Posted on Wed, 16 May 2018

I hope there's more of this to come!

ps: you have two 'come over all unnecessary's in a very short space of time - perhaps one needs changing?

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Posted in Crazu the Brave

1 Vote

You drove me to google as I

Posted on Sun, 13 May 2018

You drove me to google as I hadn't heard of this before and I 'kind of' got the gist before reading the wiki page, but it was much clearer afterwards, so I'm going to leave the link here in case anyone else is as ignorant as me: ...

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Posted in Surasawa Pond

1 Vote

This one packs a punch London

Posted on Wed, 09 May 2018

This one packs a punch London - some great imagery, it really emphasises the futility of artificial borders. Well done

One thing - are you sure it's calloused to? It's very clear what you're saying, it just sounds a bit odd to me (might...

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Posted in Calloused to Birdsong

1 Vote

Love this little moment in

Posted on Thu, 03 May 2018

Love this little moment in time. It reminds me of that strange glow colour photos used to have in the sixites and seventies. 

One small suggestion - I think it's 'puts paid to'  instead of 'pay'

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Posted in Romance Killer

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