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Hello Jason and welcome to
Posted on Mon, 02 Nov 2015
Hello Jason and welcome to ABC. There's some lovely imagery in this. A couple of suggestions: I don't think the repetition works very well - and 'dating furniture' - should be dated
Read full commentPosted in Perfectly in Place
an interesting storyline in
Posted on Wed, 28 Oct 2015
an interesting storyline in this piece Teddy. Might be worth expanding?
Read full commentPosted in Clarence Ramone
Hello L.C. and welcome to ABC
Posted on Wed, 28 Oct 2015
Hello L.C. and welcome to ABC. In answer to your question, this is engaging enough to make me want to read chapter two. A few typos and odd word choices here and there which, if you go through it again and correct (perhaps get a friend to read it...
Read full commentPosted in I don't know yet!
a nicely written children's
Posted on Thu, 22 Oct 2015
a nicely written children's story
Read full commentPosted in Dog
Hello Ty and welcome to
Posted on Mon, 21 Sep 2015
Hello Ty and welcome to ABCTales. This is a nice dreamy narrative. You might like to put it into paragraphs to encourage reads and comments,as big blocks of text can be a bit hard on the eye!
Read full commentPosted in Your Hand In Mine
this is both universal and
Posted on Sat, 29 Aug 2015
this is both universal and very personal and I'm so sorry you're going through this. If you could bear it, it might well help other people if you could publish it to a wider audience. Congratulations on your degree
Read full commentPosted in Bluesville
Hello WS and welcome to ABC.
Posted on Sat, 22 Aug 2015
Hello WS and welcome to ABC. I think you might have been cut off at the end by our word limit? Perhaps you could post this in two parts?
Read full commentPosted in Cooking for Therapists
Much better as a two-parter!
Posted on Tue, 11 Aug 2015
Much better as a two-parter!
Read full commentPosted in Whistle on the wynd part 2
Very nicely paced, and I like
Posted on Mon, 10 Aug 2015
Very nicely paced, and I like the interweaving of the relationship issues with the main plot. I think it needs a through going through for simple things that could do with being fixed (you say he has epilepsy, then you say he has an unrecognised...
Read full commentPosted in whistle on the Wynd (edit)
how beautiful this is! I wish
Posted on Tue, 04 Aug 2015
how beautiful this is! I wish you'd post more often..
Read full commentPosted in Elephant Song
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