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This is so film like - the
Posted on Sat, 15 Oct 2016
This is so film like - the mise-en-scène manages to sequence the internal and external aspects of mental health and addiction with a colourful brevity. It's such a striking piece of work.
Read full commentPosted in Branwell Clinic
A lovely adaptation with a
Posted on Fri, 21 Oct 2016
A lovely adaptation with a gentle humour.
Read full commentPosted in Owl and the Pussycat
This is so moving with its
Posted on Wed, 31 Aug 2016
This is so moving with its collision of colour against horror.
Read full commentPosted in The Grief of Gaziantep.
s
Posted on Fri, 12 Aug 2016
I love this,but feel you repeat the same sounds from verse one to three.Feel it reduces impact. Do say if it is deliberate.
Read full commentPosted in Coffee Moon Haiku Set
A powerful piece, Lev. Some
Posted on Wed, 10 Aug 2016
A powerful piece, Lev. Some of the dialogue feels expository, perhaps some backstory could reduce the need to give reason for ending it via the incident.Actions rather than words. See what you think.
Read full commentPosted in End of the line
Some strong description of
Posted on Sat, 30 Jul 2016
Some strong description of texture and setting. In places the colloquial voice felt at odds with the rather formal description, perhaps keep an eye on that.
Read full commentPosted in A Midsummer Night's Blitz (London)
Vivid, authentic, specific
Posted on Thu, 28 Jul 2016
Vivid, authentic, specific characterisation and your detail is a treat
Read full commentPosted in Strictly, The Last Supper
This feels like a meeting
Posted on Tue, 26 Jul 2016
This feels like a meeting place, with its musings and the life' philosophies you've nailed. In fact, I thoroughly look forward to reading your work when I see your new posts. This is a really special piece, it has clarity and power with a casual...
Read full commentPosted in reflections and miscellany
It feels monumental, looking
Posted on Tue, 05 Jul 2016
It feels monumental, looking out both bodily and visually as though the head is turned inside out. A striking sensation on reading it.
Read full commentPosted in Eriksay
I like the inner monologue
Posted on Tue, 28 Jun 2016
I like the inner monologue here, sounds a gorgeous place,there are lots of exclamation marks which lose their impact by the finish, perhaps you could scale back on them a little.Just a thought.
Read full commentPosted in Torremolinos 2
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