September The dread tread Of rolling bombs Loose in the pit Of my stomach Cold dawn New term chills Crack whack jabs Of hockey sticks Torture of team...
If you could hear my song You’d know we shared the stars Jewels immersed forever ours Echoes locked inside fathoms Among dead men and gardens If you...
414 of my comments have received 440 Great Feedback votes
1 Vote
This is so atmospheric,
Posted on Tue, 11 Jun 2019
This is so atmospheric, mostly grey in colour like all your writing but this isn't bleak, it has fresh air and the edges of nature hardening the characters. It would make a wonderful play but it's wonderful to read too. Full of clever phrases...
Wow, this is really terrifying like a nightmare. It reminds me of The Pied Piper of Hamlyn but perhaps much worse because of the reality of our environment and the possibility of irreversible change. Trains and stations with young children are...
It seems like such an injustice that she died alone but maybe she chose to let go when everyone had gone away or maybe her head was so full of good memories that it didn't even matter.
Lovely piece Rhiannon. I enjoyed the way you describe their beauty in yellow shades and also how you point out that they serve as a warning to the water's edge often hidden, I'd never thought of them like that. They are a very classy plant.
I enjoyed the intertwining of the natural and the supernatural here Jenny and you've included so many elements from stars in the sky to the underwater plant life. The result is dreamy and full of magic.
As others have said the first verse is a perfect accolade to these woodland beauties and then you use them as an example of what could be lost. The rich won't share, there is evidence of that all around us and so much of our natural resources is...
Thanks Insert. I'm pretty horrified by the dehumanising of people in the workforce. I know it happened in the Victorian era but I believe there was a bit in the middle where things improved and now we are returning to those dark days. The sort of...
Lots of texture and emotion in this, the metaphor of a large rock, imperfect but unbreakable as this person in your life, it sounds like somebody we could all use. 'Holding my child with feet deep in your sand' is wonderful and you cannot help...
This is so atmospheric,
Posted on Tue, 11 Jun 2019
This is so atmospheric, mostly grey in colour like all your writing but this isn't bleak, it has fresh air and the edges of nature hardening the characters. It would make a wonderful play but it's wonderful to read too. Full of clever phrases...
Read full commentPosted in Puddle of land
Wow, this is really
Posted on Tue, 04 Jun 2019
Wow, this is really terrifying like a nightmare. It reminds me of The Pied Piper of Hamlyn but perhaps much worse because of the reality of our environment and the possibility of irreversible change. Trains and stations with young children are...
Read full commentPosted in the train leaving now
It seems like such an
Posted on Mon, 03 Jun 2019
It seems like such an injustice that she died alone but maybe she chose to let go when everyone had gone away or maybe her head was so full of good memories that it didn't even matter.
Read full commentPosted in The Night My Mother Didn't Die
Lovely piece Rhiannon. I
Posted on Thu, 23 May 2019
Lovely piece Rhiannon. I enjoyed the way you describe their beauty in yellow shades and also how you point out that they serve as a warning to the water's edge often hidden, I'd never thought of them like that. They are a very classy plant.
Read full commentPosted in Bog Brilliance
I enjoyed the intertwining of
Posted on Mon, 20 May 2019
I enjoyed the intertwining of the natural and the supernatural here Jenny and you've included so many elements from stars in the sky to the underwater plant life. The result is dreamy and full of magic.
Read full commentPosted in Somewhere Lake
Really enjoyed this stand
Posted on Wed, 15 May 2019
Really enjoyed this stand-alone quirkdom. The uses of a potato know no bounds, it's no wonder the swan wanted to pass itself off as one.
Read full commentPosted in The Identity of the Potato and the Swan
Syllogism, I learned
Posted on Mon, 13 May 2019
Syllogism, I learned something new reading this. It's crazy and clever, anything involving ostriches is inherently funny.
Read full commentPosted in Ostrich Bantering in Cambridge
As others have said the first
Posted on Mon, 13 May 2019
As others have said the first verse is a perfect accolade to these woodland beauties and then you use them as an example of what could be lost. The rich won't share, there is evidence of that all around us and so much of our natural resources is...
Read full commentPosted in bluebells
Thanks Insert. I'm pretty
Posted on Sat, 11 May 2019
Thanks Insert. I'm pretty horrified by the dehumanising of people in the workforce. I know it happened in the Victorian era but I believe there was a bit in the middle where things improved and now we are returning to those dark days. The sort of...
Read full commentPosted in I Woke Up (in inverted commas)
Lots of texture and emotion
Posted on Tue, 30 Apr 2019
Lots of texture and emotion in this, the metaphor of a large rock, imperfect but unbreakable as this person in your life, it sounds like somebody we could all use. 'Holding my child with feet deep in your sand' is wonderful and you cannot help...
Read full commentPosted in rock
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