Stories & Monologues
By Denzella
I will post humorous stories and monologues in this collection and more serious stuff in a different collection.
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- 3051 reads
Names and their Importance in Literature!
Will Elsie Scraggit end up disgraced and abandoned in Brighton?
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- 21 comments
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- 14766 reads
"Despatches"
Every- body- deserves a good send-off! Don't they?
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- 6 comments
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- 2007 reads
A Brit Rides to the Rescue of the Great British Yorkshire Pudding!
You were warned Hudsonmoon!
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- 5 comments
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- 1604 reads
A Figment of My Imagination...Or is it? I P
Regrets...I have a few...and this might be one of them!
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- 12 comments
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- 3519 reads
A Flat Pack! A Handyman! And A Hangover! (I.P.)
Well according to the diagram this bit definitely goes there!
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- 14 comments
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- 3360 reads
A Monologue Part Two The Buffet
Fang continues to delight Hyacinth's guests!
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- 11 comments
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- 3582 reads
A Mother's Advice to her Daughter!
A girl needs to look after her Assets!
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- 20 comments
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- 8592 reads
A Mother's Eulogy - Written by the Mother in Question
Well, when you go it's best to leave nothing to chance!
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- 8 comments
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- 2494 reads
A Posh Girls Posh Boarding School Somewhere in a Posh Part of England (I.P.) Part One
Sounds just like my school!
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- 7 comments
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- 2326 reads
A Posh Girls Posh Boarding School Somewhere in a Posh Part of England (I.P.) Part Two
The FT Club revealed
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- 16 comments
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- 3470 reads
A Report on Questiion Time in the House
Does any of this seem familiar?
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- 2 comments
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- 1236 reads
A Resurrected Heart! Late (I.P.)
Love is like a box of chocolates! Whoever said that has eaten all the soft ones and left me with the tooth destroying hard bastards!
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- 7 comments
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- 1913 reads
A Somewhat Surprising Soprano! (I.P.)
This is based on a true story and it might just be of interest to Tony.
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- 15 comments
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- 4700 reads
A Spoonful of Jam! (Late I.P.)
So, being a top model is not a bed of roses after all!
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- 13 comments
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- 4023 reads
A Tale of Two Puddings (I.P.)
The way to a man's heart is with the downward thrust of a large knife!
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- 5 comments
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- 1795 reads
A Window Cleaner and an Exotic Dancer! (I.P.)
My husband was a window cleaner for a while so I know these things.
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- 21 comments
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- 5902 reads
Abundant Wonderment of my Fundament! I P
Jennifer Lopez, she of fundament fame...Don't you just love her?
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- 15 comments
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- 4178 reads
Ah! Viva Latino! A two hander sketch
Balongas! So descriptive, don't you think?
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- 6 comments
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- 1718 reads
Baguettes - If you see a notice - read it all! (I.P.)
Yes, always read the small print even in a baker's shop!
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- 8 comments
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- 1971 reads
Bedtime Drink! A Talking Head
Hope two together is not Denzella overload but going on Parkinson holiday.
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- 10 comments
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- 2879 reads
Comedy of Terrors! (I.P.)
No!
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- 12 comments
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- 2924 reads
Cooperation - A Recently Published Government White Paper (I.P.)
Government White Papers - Don't you just love well written fiction?
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- 9 comments
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- 2651 reads
Court in the Rain I.P. Part Two
Move over Mrs Trollop - there's a new kid on the block!
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- 13 comments
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- 4156 reads
Daddy or Chips?
A Father's Day Card!
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- 12 comments
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- 3499 reads
Freedom and Euthanasia!
Sorry, but it is a subject I feel strongly about!
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- 14 comments
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- 3552 reads
Give the Dog a Bone!
This is based on a true story. It happened in a place called Malmo in Sweden. It was featured in the most popular GSD magazine of the time and came from an article printed in the Sunday Express.
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- 6 comments
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- 1731 reads
Reflections!
Is it possible to love too much?
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- 13 comments
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- 3442 reads
Sleepless in Settle! (I.P.)
Sleepless nights! Tell me about it!
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- 12 comments
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- 3191 reads
Sunshine and Showers! (I.P.)
Could do with a nice holiday in the sun.
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- 2 comments
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- 3729 reads
The Crack in the Pavement (I.P.)
I thought cracks in pavements were the responsibility of the council.
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- 11 comments
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- 3786 reads
Time to Take a Step Back (I.P.)
Time to take stock and time to step back!
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- 13 comments
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- 3397 reads
Fathers and Sons! I. P.
I think Charles and Chrissie spoil that boy of theirs!
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- 8 comments
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- 2443 reads
The Birthday! A Monologue
The Birthday! A Monologue I don’t suppose I’ll see anyone today. We keep ourselves to ourselves round here… best way, really. Never know who you...
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- 31 comments
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- 17438 reads
My Big Cooking Adventure!
This is the story of a birthday present that turned a normal, peace-loving woman into a kitchen warrior!
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- 15 comments
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- 4649 reads
The Party
A Mini Manifesto! At the next Election vote for...
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- 4 comments
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- 1569 reads
Waterworld - Manufacturers of a revolutionary new product
If you suffer from bladder weakness then this could be the product for you.
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- 4 comments
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- 1883 reads
The Invitation A Monologue Part One
Don't we all love guests who bring their pets!
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- 4 comments
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- 2011 reads
My Mum Revisited
Some further adventures of living with my Mum!
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- 13 comments
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- 3678 reads
Three Dead Twins
A tragic duty!
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- 17 comments
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- 4193 reads
My Mum - The Party Dress!
The Army Surplus Party Dress!
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- 18 comments
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- 5822 reads
More Wartime Recollections of Mum Flo's Family
The Wartime experiences of a family living in extraordinary times!
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- 8 comments
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- 2148 reads
The Summer Ball and Weapons of Mass Destruction!
Balls, Bugs and Weapons of Mass Destruction!
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- 6 comments
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- 1894 reads
My Mum and A Piano for Patrick!
Hops! A piano! And a boy!
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- 4 comments
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- 1448 reads
The Male Menopause!
The Male Menopause is a recognized and well documented condition similar to Man Flue! Ignore it at your peril!
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- 8 comments
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- 2215 reads
My Mum - Escapades!
A misspent Childhood!
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- 12 comments
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- 4616 reads
My Mum - The Final Curtain
A Mum for all seasons!
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- 19 comments
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- 6644 reads
Rags to Riches I P
Oh, I so love a happy ending!
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- 13 comments
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- 3379 reads
My Mum - The Funeral!
A solemn and sombre occasion...erm...perhaps not!
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- 16 comments
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- 6297 reads
Jealousy - I've no time for it...Well, perhaps just a little! I P
Jealous? No,never...I just like fruit!
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- 784 reads
Loneliness! (I P)
Who would have thought a box that had contained a celebration cake could be so revealing?
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- 6 comments
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- 1723 reads
My Mum - The Visit!
Another tale concerning my wonderful, eccentric, embarrassing and non-conforming MUM!
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- 10 comments
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- 2733 reads
Last Call for Novice Bitch!
Novice bitch...I don't think so!
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- 16 comments
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- 4217 reads
My Mum and The Christmas Washing Machine Story!
Mum takes the waters!
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- 10 comments
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- 3942 reads
Macaroni Cheese - A Dish to Aid Memory! I. P.
Never a lender or a borrower be!
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- 2 comments
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- 1174 reads
The Wrong Bus I.P.
It was definitely going in the wrong direction!
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- 6 comments
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- 1933 reads
The Female Menopause!
The Female Menopause! Definitely a time to rid the house of all sharp objects!
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- 9 comments
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- 2834 reads
Tracey Stacey and Naughty Nigel...My Invisible Friend! I. P.
A Good Friend is worth what exactly?
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- 7 comments
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- 2339 reads
Fecundity! Are You Kidding? I.P.
It's not just actions that have consequences...Words can have consequences too!
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- 8 comments
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- 2568 reads
Marshmallow or Birthday Cake?
The joy of working in a kennels on a day when it is pissatively possing down!
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- 11 comments
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- 2793 reads
Tiny Twitter Tales I P
Can't think of one!
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- 4 comments
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- 1353 reads
Going for Gold - The Sequel
After a speech like that...who wouldn't love him!
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- 19 comments
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- 4584 reads
My Mum and The Caravan - Part One The Party!
One moment ploughing the depths of despair - the next, lifting my eyes to Heaven!
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- 2 comments
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- 875 reads
My Mum and The Caravan - Part Two!
My Mum always said you shouldn't laugh at other peoples' misfortune!
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- 7 comments
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- 2325 reads
Persephone Frobisher Frightens Me!
It's a Dog's Life!
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- 7 comments
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- 2051 reads
Ivan the Infiltrator! (Late IP)
(IP) Better to be late than 'dead' on time!
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- 19 comments
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- 4267 reads
Tops!
A little known condition...wardrobe shrinkage or wardrobe fatigue!
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- 11 comments
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- 2706 reads
Maps! (I.P.)
Maps can lead you from A to B but can they be trusted?
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- 6 comments
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- 1777 reads
The Bridge
Diesel and Doughnuts...what a combination!
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- 13 comments
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- 4029 reads
The Astrologer! (Late I.P.)
My chart told me the I.P. was changed on Saturdays!
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- 4 comments
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- 1330 reads
Inspiration! I.P.
First I have to find Inspiration and now you demand a teaser!
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- 25 comments
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- 7623 reads
My I.P. (Late?) Thesaurus Word Finder!
Can I interest anyone in a word or two? Free to good homes only.
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- 781 reads
Pansy Potter - Hallowed Be Thy Name! Part One
George Breadman...who would have thought it?
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- 4 comments
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- 1348 reads
Pansy Potter - Hallowed Be Thy Name! Part Two
Don't mess with Mums when they're on a mission!
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- 12 comments
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- 2978 reads
Now Where Is He? (I.P.)
Every Cloud...
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- 10 comments
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- 2505 reads
Weight and See! A Monologue
Anyone who eats two lettuce leaves, a whole cherry tomato and a slice of cucumber is just plain greedy!
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- 7 comments
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- 1989 reads
The Classroom! A Monologue
Aaah! Joyce...I'm doing my best!
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- 9 comments
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- 5084 reads
Miss Lavender and Her Adventure in Bluebell Woods!
Poor Miss Lavender, subjected to such an ordeal very nearly had a touch of the vapours!
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- 6 comments
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- 1823 reads
Has Nurse Brannigan Made A Full Recovery? Approx 363 words
Has she returned to work too early?
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- 1 comment
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- 768 reads
Nurse Brannigan Is Fully Recovered. Approx 654 words..
It could happen?
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- 20 comments
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- 5659 reads
The Good Doctor I.P. Part One
It's been known!
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- 7 comments
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- 2259 reads
The Good Doctor I. P. Part Two
I'm telling you it's not unknown!
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- 11 comments
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- 3669 reads
Didn't We Have a Lovely Day the Day We Went To...?
Are map inches the same as male inches?
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- 9 comments
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- 2099 reads
My Mum and a Wedding!
Who Dares Wins!
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- 16 comments
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- 2858 reads
The Electricity Bill and the Five Hundred Pound Dress! I.P.
Don't take on board someone else's idea of morality!
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- 7 comments
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- 2423 reads
Gene Kelly - I Want A Word With You! (I.P.)
I might not be Debbie Reynolds but I know a Gene Kelly wannabee when I see one!
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- 9 comments
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- 2450 reads
The Marriage of Naomi! (I P) Part One
Here comes the bride all fat and wide!
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- 7 comments
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- 2397 reads
The Marriage of Naomi! (I P) Part Two
Well, who would have thought it...Paulette a convert to that Mozart bloke!
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- 5 comments
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- 1840 reads
The Marriage of Naomi (I P) Part Three
So now you know...
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- 18 comments
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- 4474 reads
Infinite Sky!
It was so cold my boobs took on the appearance of a couple of Belgium Buns, you know, the sort with cherries on top!
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- 19 comments
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- 5615 reads
Dripsnot Goes in Search of a Wife!
Elsie Dripsnot not exactly an improvement on Elsie Scraggit!
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- 24 comments
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- 5907 reads
Loneliness! Re-posted
I'm not sure about this one so thought I would re-post
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- 20 comments
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- 4238 reads
The Silence of the Night! 329 words
The Silence of the Night! 329 words A gunshot sliced through the silence of the night. A woman fell to the ground. Lights went on. People looked out...
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- 8 comments
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- 2581 reads
True She Was Plain...If Only She Was Likable! (I.P.)
True She Was Plain…If Only She Was Likeable? (I.P.) No! I didn’t like her, this new girlfriend of his and she didn’t like me. I was quite surprised...
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- 11 comments
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- 3627 reads
No! She Wasn't Likeable!
No!. She Wasn’t Likeable! I had definitely got a handle on her…Bernice, my son, Martin’s, girlfriend. I’m not usually one to criticise someone for...
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- 31 comments
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- 13026 reads
Words Are All I Have To Give!
Words Are All I Have To Give! Re-Posted for no other reason than I didn't like the title - Sorry! The aim of a thesaurus word finder is to provide...
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- 14 comments
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- 4226 reads
'Maybe Joe' A homage to Hazel 1293 words
‘Maybe Joe’ - A Homage to Hazel 1293 words I have a dear friend called Hazel and three years ago she had a stroke. It was devastating to all of us...
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- 15 comments
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- 4273 reads
For a Long Time I Went To Bed Early! I.P.
For a long time I went to bed early. I.P. 1192 words But then I gave it up. Tonight, however, I was thinking I might catch a few extra zzz’s. What...
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- 15 comments
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- 10180 reads
Marianne...faithful? I.P. (New Beginnings)
Marianne…faithful? I.P. (New Beginnings) 1557 words John looked across the table at Marianne and wondered, not for the first time, how he had the...
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- 9 comments
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- 4458 reads
The Labour Ward! (I.P.)
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The Labour Ward! (I.P.) Lucy and her friend, Amy, burst in from the garden laughing and pushing each other before the two of them disappeared into...
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- 24 comments
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- 10063 reads
The Pensioner!
The Pensioner’s Tale! It’s Saturday today, otherwise I would have started but there would be little point. No, not with what I’ve got planned. You...
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- 14 comments
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- 3980 reads
Prison - Cell Mates - I.P. A Monologue 1090 words
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Part One - Prison - Cell Mates! A Monologue 1090 words She was beginning to get on my nerves with all her questions. ‘How come they let you out so...
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- 8 comments
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- 2858 reads
Friday Night Fever! (A Late I.P.) Last week's theme Resurrection
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Friday Night Fever! (Late I.P.) Gloria and I had just arrived when she suddenly spotted someone she knew, ‘Hi Jerome. Jerome…it’s me, Gloria.’ ‘...
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- 6 comments
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- 1787 reads
The World at War!
World at War! 2319 words ‘Get yourself down to the recruiting office you’re no use on the farm.’ said Squire. ‘Your country needs you. I shouldn’t...
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- 6 comments
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- 2883 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Nine 1010 words
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The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Nine - 1010 words Whittaker and Georgia had managed to speak to most of the people and left others to...
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- 11 comments
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- 3685 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Ten - 1177 Words - Updated
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The Labour Planet – A Working Title – Part Ten – 1177 Words Jamie’s lungs were at bursting point as he held his breath not daring to move in case the...
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- 6 comments
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- 2239 reads
The Rehearsal! late I.P.
The Rehearsal! Late I.P. There we were all on stage awaiting the arrival of Chelsea, Chelsea Le Curr, our celebrated leading lady. She eventually...
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- 2 comments
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- 1256 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Eleven - 1131 Words
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The Labour Planet – A Working Title – Part Eleven – 1131 Words While Jamie stood still trying to assess his situation another Grusalien stepped...
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- 6 comments
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- 1645 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Twelve - 991 words
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The Labour Planet – A Working Title - Part Twelve - 991 words When Whittaker and Georgia went back to see how Jamie was they were once again...
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- 12 comments
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- 3307 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Thirteen - 1073 Words - Updated
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The Labour Planet – A Working Title - Part Thirteen – 1174 words Whittaker, Georgia and Jamie were pushed forward to join the others forming an...
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- 14 comments
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- 3664 reads
The Labour Planet - A Working Title - Part Fourteen - 1147 words
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The Labour Planet – A Working Title – Part Fourteen - 1147 words Seeing Jamie’s reaction all three started to move nearer to the enclosure. ‘Now will...
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- 9 comments
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- 2895 reads
It's Still Another Day! (I.P.)
It’s Still Another Day! (I.P.) 1478 words The two boys left her for dead, but, unbeknown to them she was still breathing. The lads were no more than...
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- 18 comments
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- 4825 reads
Flight DCT 13
Flight DCT 13 1592 words - Cobbled together from some old emails Another one from The Parkinson's Players' Revue 'Where Did It All Go Wrong?' Running...
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- 2 comments
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- 1299 reads
Tea and a Belgian Bun! I.P. 1171 Words
Tea and a Belgian Bun! I.P. 1177 Words 'So what did you do with the body?' “That was the first thing I heard as I sipped my tea in the supermarket...
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- 10 comments
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- 2563 reads
Life, Love and Laughter!
Life, Love and Laughter! 1212Words I woke up this morning feeling fine not knowing that my life was about to change forever. It started off okay...
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- 31 comments
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- 10193 reads
It's In His Genes!
It's in his Genes! 1462 Words Woke up this morning feeling fine. Then I remembered. This day my life could change forever. I was frightened by the...
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- 8 comments
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- 3950 reads
The Art Critic! 1200 words
The Art Critic! 1200 words The Gallery Proprietor is marked as Prop throughout script The Proprietor is already on stage giving his paintings a bit...
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- 2 comments
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- 1106 reads
Nutters in May -A short sketch from the 2015 Parkinson's show.
For Bee Nutters in May! – 1860 Words A Parody of Nuts in May The period is late 1960’s. A middle class couple go on a camping trip. The man, Roger,...
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- 15 comments
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- 5810 reads
Budget Airlines
An amended version of Budget Airlines! - 1993 words one sketch taken from the Parkinson's Players 2016 Show entitled Always Look on the Bright Side...
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- 10 comments
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- 3041 reads
The Sat Navigator!- 1556 words
The Sat Navigator! - 1556 words This is a two person sketch but there are two other people with one line. Valerie is the Sat Navigator Pat is Jodine...
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- 4 comments
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- 1271 reads
A Life Unravelling! 974 words
A Life Unravelling! 951 words IP Mobility It started with a shake...nothing much. I felt fine in my general health but still, I took a trip to the...
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- 15 comments
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- 3104 reads
Proof of the Pudding! A sketch from a Parkinson's show
Proof of the Pudding! 1509 Words A spoof on Agatha Christie Cast List Miss Marple Identical twins, Constance and Camille. They are far from identical...
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- 11 comments
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- 2920 reads
Secrets and Ties! IP 'Secrets' 909 Words
Secrets and Ties! IP ‘Secret's Oh, Sonia, just look at that gorgeous dress. Where? Look, see, over on that rail, the magenta one. Oh, I see it but,...
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- 16 comments
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- 4166 reads
Love
Oh, Charles, you looked so handsome in your uniform when you left. I hate us being separated but tell me, darling, do you think of me when you’re up...
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The Collector!
Oh, Charles, why couldn’t James have collected stamps? This man is a policeman and he says our son has been caught on CCTV ram-raiding cash machines...
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Love Two!
Oh, Fiona, don’t cry. You know I don’t like leaving you when you’re like this. You wanted a man in uniform, even though you knew the job would mean...
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- 7 comments
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- 2413 reads
A Likely Story!
A Likely Story! ‘ Did you see that?’ I said to my husband. ‘ See what?’ he answered. ‘ See that woman with the bag?’ ‘ No.’ We were waiting in the...
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- 6 comments
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The Invitation!
The Invitation This is a letter I wrote to my brother in law, a man not known for his ability to hold his nerve in what he might regard as a ‘...
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- 9 comments
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- 3151 reads