Podger's philosophy

PODGER'S PHILOSOPHY

A poem for those in need of advice

When feeling low paint a self portrait

When feeling really low paint a portrait of someone you hate and then
burn it.

When in debt write fake cheques to yourself.

Post yourself at least two cards a few days before your birthday, this
avoids disappointment if no one sends you anything.

Never write yourself "things to do" lists.

Leave the television on when you go out. This way no one will try to
break in .

Paint every room in your house a different colour and don't paint any
of them white.

Always pin pictures of loved ones to your mirror, this is probably the
thing you will stare at most.

Never take advice. Especially not from web pages or from people with
stupid names such as Podger.