Dreamer

I became lost in my words they lifted me, they guided me, they whispered everything and I know about who I was and who I would become, they brought order out of the chaos but they couldn’t erase the lingering lump in my throat. If Only……..
When I was younger I never wanted to come back to Walsh but I didn’t have much of a choice because after we moved back my mom became very ill and so we stayed because moving would be too much of a strain and we were close to family.
I had always thought that Walsh was boring until the day Jerel Snow disappeared.
I didn’t know Jerel very well but we had talked a few times and well he was interesting sometimes. The police weren’t really worried because Jerel went up and missing for a month last year just because he felt like it so it wasn’t really a big deal.
I looked at the paintings hanging on the living room walls the ones with the dancing girls laughing and having a genuinely gay time. I wanted to be like them, almost pleadingly as I stroked the crimson paint to feel the brush strokes, hoping maybe to absorb its warmth.
My room was cool and shadowed as I walked in and took in the cherry smell. My room always smells like cherries because I have this cherry body spray that I love and cherry popery. No one was home which was normal I end up cooking for myself most of the time anyway so its no big deal. But their was something strange about my room something out of place a letter placed directly perfectly in the center of my pillow.
I never get letters aside from the ones my best friend Alex sends me and this was not an Alex letter. My name Raven is written neatly on the front in exquisite handwriting I recognized but did not know who it belonged to. I had two option throw it away or open it but we all know which option I chose. I opened it.
Hello Raven
I know you, it may sound strange but I know you better now than I ever did before. You can find me just think. And I know you’ll try to find me now only because I have sent you this letter and sparked your imagination.
Jerel Snow

What! This is far beyond me maybe I should give this letter to the police. Is he really missing this time no he said I could find him does that mean he wants me to find him. I am so confused.
The phone rang I let the answer machine pick up while my mind wandered. I thought back to one of the first conversations we had and it was definitely not the talk I wanted to have. We had a class assignment and he was my partner and we ended up working at my house because his was twenty miles outside of town.
“So where are your parents?” he asked
“My dad is at work and my mom is in the hospital,” I said trying to keep my hands busy so I would not have to look at his face.
“So do you spend all your time alone in the house then because we rarely see you outside of school?”
“Let’s get to work” I said and handed him some papers
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to talk to him it was just he knew all the answers to the questions he was asking. Thanks to that talk we had I started going to the park and hanging out there, laying under the water tower when it was really hot outside.
Jerel knew that his note would get to me and it had done its part already. I decided I needed some air. I walked past the yellow house that had the tree whose branches reached toward the sky like a hand with its palm up and its fingers outstretched. I knew where I was headed the place I always go when I need to think.
I arrived at the park in less than ten minutes. I walked toward the water tower which looked like a giant silver sucker that I wouldn’t recommend licking. I laid on the soft grass and stared up at the crystal clear blue sky.
As I laid undisturbed I thought about something I had written lat year.
The mind is a strange thing
Much like a rose it has its thorns
But avoiding those thorns you will eventually find the true beauty.
I remember now that my diary or my Poetry book went missing near the time Jerel disappeared I wonder if he has it. If he had found it why would he have kept it. I fell asleep there under the water tower with the wind blowing softly.
In my dream Jerel stood in the shade of a large tree, the wind was blowing his black bangs out of his gorgeous green eyes that had speck of blue which made his eyes shimmer like glitter in the sun. I was looking at myself from a third persons view just an observer. I was standing in the sun my long red loosely curled hair blowing in the wind mimicking Jerel’s bangs. My blues sparkling as I walked toward Jerel the wind became harder and he just smiled his perfect smile his fake smile I thought.
I woke up and it must have been about an hour later because it was dark now and I had a good distance to walk before I would get home. So I began walking I had always hated the dark but it didn’t seem to be bothering me tonight. I walked until I heard footsteps mimicking mine in perfect harmony which scared me to death so I started to run and the person behind me was trying to match my strides. The person was gaining on me now so I began running faster I made it to my door.
I opened the door hurried inside locked it and eased myself to the ground and leaned against the door not wanting to know who was following me. I went to the stove and put some water on for tea. I think I needed something to help me calm down so I put the bag in and went to my room. I opened my window and looked outside there was nothing out there but I quickly closed it and locked it as well.
My Dad was home and already in bed it was nine o’clock when I had gotten home I’m not sure my Dad realized I wasn’t home because I had left my light on and my door closed which might have worked to my advantage. I have a terrible headache so I drank my tea took an aspirin and went to bed.
The next morning I got up and was happy to realize it was summer. I looked around and I couldn’t believe it there was a new letter on my dresser how is he getting into my house and my room. Let alone why is he getting into my house and my room.
I remember now he must have my diary because I wrote where I hid the spare key in their. I guess I could move it now but then I wouldn’t get any more letters and I need more clues because then I can find him and ask him all the questions I have to ask him.
So I open the newest letter.
I suppose the reason why you were sitting in front of the water tower was to think. So have you figured anything out yet? If you leave me a note maybe I can answer a few of your questions. Oh and if you haven’t figured it out I found your poetry book and originally I wasn’t going to read it I was just going to give it back to you but then I opened it up to the first page and I read the very first poem in their you must have wrote it a long time ago.
Jerel
I remember that poem now and it was definitely not what I have been writing more recently.
Glass and frame is nothing special
The magic you see is up to you
The image reflected is what is important to me
The hurt the pain the sadness in your eyes
That is all I care about
It is the reflection
Told by mirror