Bed is a Boat

By Bee

Tue, 07 Oct 2014
  • 2178 reads
6 comments
 

Bed, a boat -
water, deep.

Fishes, thoughts -
elusive;

nets, holes -
hope less.

Float boat 
heavy load - burdens,

cares. Fear drowning.
Shock awareness

awakens mourning
light headed, 

anchorless being
at sea.

Certificate PG
Poem
Unclassified

Comments

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi Bee. Can hear the water lapping against the hull.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Bee on

So pleased you heard it.

Thanks PT

Bee

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Bee

Again simple, but full of meaning, no doubt different for each reader.

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks so much, Jean.

Bee

Submitted by VeraClark on

This is beautiful because it floats you many ways with a wise word economy. Not easy when you go small, it's often much harder and involves sacrificial word fleecing and eye tics. 

 

Submitted by Bee on

Yes, it's unnatural to go over the top with word economy. Really pleased you thought this worked, Vera.

Thank you for such lovely comments. 

Bee