Match made in Heaven

"September by name, September by nature"

It was a stupid line, she wished she could stop saying it but it nicely
broke the icy silence that always followed when she told someone her
name "Hi, my name's September, September Lawns". It was of course
always followed by speculation about exactly what Septembers nature
might be.
The answer she gave depended on who she was talking to at the time.
Someone she was attracted to would get "You'll just have to find that
out for yourself" always said with eyes wide and lips parted, whereas
boring people always got a stern look and "Mostly cloudy and wet with a
high probability of strong winds from the South".

She could not remember when she first used the line but it was probably
picked up from her brother, Richard, who always used the same line as a
joke until they started shortening his name. September was often
shortened too but not with such devastating circumstances. Seppie was
the current favourite of close friends and was often these days
truncated even further to just Sep. One thing is for sure, September
Lawns is an unusual name and she has lived with the consequences, good
and bad, for 35 years now.

She lost count of how many times she interrogated her parents to find
out why they chose such a name. She had tried anger, catching them off
guard, sweet darling daughter, but nothing worked, they just pretended
not to remember. She was born April 16th 1966 so the obvious choice, if
months were fashionable, would be April Lawns or going back 9 months
July, maybe August but for sure not September! Having now seen the
pictures of her parents in the 60's and met a few of their old friends,
especially the one known only as 'Loopy', her favourite theory was drug
abuse. It would explain why 'Loopy' only visited late at night and
always spent far too long looking over his shoulder. It would
also explain the reluctance to talk about it, her father as White House
press secretary could certainly not afford any sniff of a scandal about
past experiments to find that Technicolor dreamworld. She was certain
they had found it and that somewhere in there was a Walrus riding a
bicycle through a poppy field that who thought 'September' was a nice
name.

On balance September had no doubt that if she ever met that Walrus she
would shake its hand warmly. Having never met 'the right man' she had
thrown her energy into a career as a reporter. With such a memorable
name allied to excellent work she quickly outgrew papers and radio and
kept rising until she got to her current position as one of the most
popular anchors on CNN. In this position, if she had not been blessed
with such a name she would have had to invent one. How else could she
stand a chance of competing with the likes of 'Wolf Blitzer', 'Doug
Spank', Pussy Galore' and 'Ninja Kahn'?

"What an incredibly beautiful name and, if I may be so bold, it matches
your eyes". Not an entirely new approach, but this guy actually looked
like he meant every word he said.

"Why thank you, er, I'm terribly sorry but I didn't catch your name
earlier"

"Well let me introduce myself, my name is Augustus, Augustus Field"