The Mistake

I never meant to get involved, never meant to mess up the way I did.
It was all a mistake, just a stupid mistake. That's what I kept telling
myself?

It was what I was telling myself in the car all the way to the police
station, my mum sitting stiff and pale beside me.

It's what I'm telling myself now, with the policeman peering into my
face, my hands sticky with sweat.

"It was a mistake," I mutter, "I didn't mean to?"

My voice comes out whiny and false. The policeman leans forward.

"Just tell me the truth, Dave. Tell me how it happened."

I lean back in the chair, force myself to take a breath. The truth.
Right, the truth.

Taking another deep breath, I think back. Back to when I made the
Mistake?

It was evening - about nine thirty - and I was walking home from my
youth club. Between the broad, yellow rays of the street lamps, the
pavement was crowded with shadows.

When I was little, I remember being scared of those shadows. I used to
sprint past them, leap over them. I wouldn't dare to look at them. But
when you're fourteen years old you aren't scared of the dark.

I have to admit I jumped, though, when all of a sudden a voice came out
of the blackness just ahead of me.

"All right, Dave?"

I grinned with relief when I realised who it was. "Luke, man, you
nearly gave me a heart attack!"

Luke was a boy in the year above me at school. We were sort of mates. I
say sort of, because I hardly ever saw him. He bunked off school half
the time, and he mainly hung around with his older friends. We hadn't
talked in ages.

We were talking now.

"Busy tonight?" Luke asked. He was leaning against the wall of Mrs
Walker's front garden, and his face was hidden in the shadows.

"Why d'you want to know?" I asked. There was something in his voice
that made me edgy.

"Me and some mates thought of a really cool dare," he said. "A real
laugh."

"So?"

"We were wondering if you'd like to come along."

"Nah," I said. "I'll get done if I'm back too late."
I turned and started walking up the street towards my house.

"Chicken!" Luke called.

I stopped at that. I turned and looked at him.
He'd stepped into the light now. He stood there, his arms folded, with
a sort of smirk spread over his face.

"C'mon," he said. "It'll be a real laugh. C'mon, Dave."

That was where I made my big Mistake. Luke was dodgy, I should've
remembered that.
But I thought: What am I so worried about? He said It'd be a laugh,
right? I probably am just being a chicken, like he said. A chicken and
a wuss.

"O.k," I said.

He grinned. "I knew you'd come."

"So, what's this cool dare?" I asked, as we turned and walked down the
dark street.

"Wait and see," he said.

That made me suspicious, when he said that. But I'd made up my mind
now.

We walked for a long time. I was starting to wonder if this cool dare
was worth it. I knew my mum would be going mad - it was getting
late.

"Will this take long, Luke?" I asked.

"Not long," he said. "We're nearly there."

We turned into a narrow sidestreet behind some shops. I could see a
bunch of teenagers leaning against the wall, smoking.

"Uh? Luke?" I said, hanging back as they turned to face us. They were a
rough crowd. I recognised a few of them. I remembered that one of them
had beaten up a boy in my year so badly he had to stay off school for a
month. When he came back, his face was still puffy and swollen. Three
of his teeth had been knocked out.

As they turned to face us, I was pretty sure we were going to get
beaten up. I got ready to leg it as fast as I could.

Then one of them grinned.

"All right, Luke?"

Amazed, I looked up at Luke. He was grinning, too.

"All right," he said. "This is my mate Dave."

I said nothing. I was still thinking about that boy's three missing
teeth. What had I got myself into?

"Right," said one of the boys, the oldest one. He seemed to be the
leader. "Let's go."

"Go where?" I hissed at Luke, as we moved off.

"Not far," Luke snapped. "Now shut it, will you?"

"Some laugh this is," I muttered.

We stopped round the back of a shop. I recognised it. It was where my
older brother, Anthony, worked after school. It sold electrical stuff -
radios, hi-fi's, t.v's, you know the kind of thing. I'd been in there
loads of times - all the people in there knew me.

Looking at it then, I suddenly wished I didn't recognise it, because I
was beginning to guess what Luke and his mates were planning.

I still didn't know just what they had in store for me, though.

I realised they were expecting me to do something, because I looked
round and they were all watching me, waiting for me to do? what?

I backed away a few paces.

"What?" I asked. "What is it?"

The oldest one (the leader) turned and glared at Luke.

"You didn't tell him?"

Luke shifted uncomfortably.

"He wouldn't've come if I'd told him."

"What?" I demanded. "Told me what?"

Luke grinned uneasily.

"The dare?"

"Yeah?"

He nodded towards a little window in the wall of the shop. It was
really high up, and tiny. Hardly any burglar could fit through that
window.

I guess that's why it had been left open.

"Right?" Luke said, "you've got to climb through there, and get the
keys, and open the door."

I really wanted to kill him.

"What!?" I yelled.

I guess they realised I wasn't too happy, because the oldest boy turned
to Luke.

"He will do it, right?"

"Yeah! Of course he will, won't you, Dave?"

"No!" I exploded. "What are you, crazy? I'm not breaking into any
shop!"

I turned to run, and bumped into someone standing behind me. It was a
boy from the 6th form. He was about twice my size (I'm really short for
my age) and had fists like boulders.
I looked around and realised I was surrounded by lots more boys, all of
them bigger, meaner and tougher than I was. And they were all watching
me.

The leader turned to face me.

"You will do it, right?" he said, quietly. His fists were clenched, and
the bones were white under the skin. I swallowed, and glanced at Luke.
He was gazing at me, begging me with his eyes. It was then I realised
he was just as scared of them as I was.

"Come on, Dave," he said. "You don't have to nick anything."

They were still watching me.

"All right," I said. I felt like throwing up.

I had to stand on Luke's shoulders to reach the window. Like I said, it
was tiny. Only a midget like me could've got through.

"You know where they keep the keys, right?" Luke murmured, as he pushed
me up so I could reach the latch. "Your brother works here, doesn't
he?"

"Yeah," I said. "I know where they keep 'em."
As I scrambled on to the windowsill my foot knocked Luke's head. He
swore.

"Sorry," I muttered, then wondered why I'd apologised. Luke deserved a
kick in the face.

Twisting and wriggling, I managed to squeeze my way through the window.
My hands were slippery with sweat. All I could think about was that I'd
broken the law. I'd broken into a shop. I wondered what the penalty for
that was. They couldn't send fourteen year olds to prison, could
they?

I was pretty sure they couldn't.

"Get on with it!" Luke hissed. I was still sitting with my legs
dangling inside the window.

Taking a deep breath, I pushed myself off the windowsill and landed
inside the shop. The impact stung my feet.

I knew they kept the spare set of keys inside one of the desk drawers.
I made my way over to the desk and started searching.

Looking back now, I could've stopped then. The door was locked, so the
other boys couldn't get at me where I was. I could've stayed in there
all night if I wanted. But I just wasn't thinking straight. I hadn't
been thinking straight from the beginning.

I found the keys in the second drawer. They jangled in my hand as I
moved to the door.
I tried each key in the bunch. The fourth one turned in the lock.

Took your time," said the oldest boy as I opened the door. At least I
thought it was him. I couldn't be sure, because they'd all covered
their faces with balaclavas.

Then they were all pushing past me, into the shop. The door clicked
shut behind them.

They worked quickly, pulling things off the shelves like greedy
children in a sweet shop. I watched helplessly, wondering what Mr
Browning would say when he came back to find half the stuff gone from
the shop. Wondering if he'd ever find out what I'd done, and what would
happen if he did. Anthony would probably lose his job.
But, if things went as planned, he'd never know. I felt myself relax a
bit. Nobody would ever have to know?

Then I heard something that made my heart skip a beat. My insides
seemed to turn to jelly. Because I could hear someone coming down the
stairs that led up from the corner of the shop.
"Who's there?" said a voice, and the next moment a torchbeam flashed
right into my face.
It was Mrs Patterson from upstairs. I could have kicked myself. I'd
clean forgotten all about her. And, dimwit that I was, I was the only
one in the room without my face covered.

She recognised me, of course. Everyone in that shop knew who I
was.

"David!" she gasped. "What the -"

Until that moment I'd been frozen to the spot with fear. Then my legs
kicked into action.

Before she could say another word, I was out of the door and into the
street. I don't think I've ever run so fast.

The other boys were all around me, swearing and cursing, still with the
radios and other things they'd nicked tucked under their arms or
stuffed up their jackets.

My feet stung and I had a stitch in my side, but I didn't stop running.
I didn't stop running until I'd gone all the way back home and was
standing outside my front door.

Even then I only paused for a second. Pushing the door open, I darted
into the hall. My mum came out of the sitting room.

"Dave!" she said. "Where the hell have you-"
I didn't want to face her. I sprinted up the stairs to my room, slammed
the door and bolted it. Then I sank to the floor, dizzy and sick with
fear.

I looked at my hands. They were shaking. I could see my face in the
mirror that was leaning against the wall in the corner of the room. I
looked terrible. My face had gone paper-white, apart from my nose,
which was bright red from the cold outside.

My stomach churned, and for the second time that day I felt like
throwing up.

This time, I did.

My mum was hammering on the door.

"Dave! Dave! Open this door NOW!"

I didn't answer. I felt like swearing, or throwing something, but I
didn't have the strength.

Instead I leaned against the door with my head in my hands. Mrs
Patterson would have called the police by now. They were probably on
the way to my house. Oh, hell?

Why did I have to be such an idiot? Why did I have to be such a
dimwitted, pea-brained, cowardly stupid little git? I should have known
not to listen to Luke. If I'd just gone home in the first place, none
of this would have happened?

I groaned.

Then the doorbell rang. I felt suddenly cold, like someone had stuffed
a load of ice cubes down my back. I knew it had to be the police.

My mum stopped yelling and went downstairs to answer the door. I heard
a man's voice, and my mum's answering. I couldn't quite make out what
they were saying?

Then my mum was coming back up the stairs. She sounded like she was in
shock.

"Yes," I heard her say. "Yes, of course, officer?"

My heart was thudding like a sledge hammer. It really was the police.
They'd come for me. Oh, God?

Then my mum was knocking on the door. She sounded really angry now. I
wished the ground would swallow me up, I was so ashamed.

"Dave, the police are here, and you'd better come out here right now or
I swear I'll break this door down. Do you hear me?"

Trembling, I got to my feet. I knew I couldn't hide out in my room
forever, and she sounded so angry I thought she really might break the
door down.

Slowly, I reached out and unbolted the door. My mum was standing with a
policeman behind her. I think she was going to give me an earful, but
she stopped when she saw my face.

"This is officer White," she said instead. "He says you've been
reported in connection with-" a pained look crossed her face "- a
robbery."

I stayed silent, my eyes on the floor.

"I'd like to take him to the station for questioning," said officer
White. "You may accompany him, of course?"

A few minutes later I was in the police car, on my way to the
station.

And that's why I'm sitting here now, with the policeman peering into my
face.

"It was a mistake," I mutter, "I didn't mean to?"

And I didn't, I really didn't mean to. It was a mistake. That's all it
was.