second chance

prologue

Austin McShane waited at the intersection for the light to change. He couldn't believe how great his life was. He lived in Colorado, with his wife Haley and their four beautiful children. He was a Pediatrician, with his own private practice. A man couldn't ask for anything more.

He looked over at his oldest Daughter Ally. she and Alisha, looked just like Haley. they both had her gorgeous red hair, green eyes. His youngest daughter Abby and six month old son A.J. looked just like him. They had his dark hair, blue-green eyes and two deep dimples in each cheek. Haley always laughed when he told people he had a matched set.

Usually Haley took the kids to school; but this morning she woke with a fever. She tried to tell him she was ok, but he could see she wasn't. He gave her some Tylenol, a glass of water and made her promise she would stay in bed. He told her he would drop the kids off at day care on his way to the clinic.

The light turned green. Austin just pulled into the intersection, when he heard the squealing tires. He looked over just in time to see a eighteen wheeler skidding into the intersection. It struck Austin's truck on the passenger side; sending the truck rolling. Austin's seat belt failed and he slammed his chest and ribs into the steering wheel. His head hit the driver side window hard enough to shatter it.

Austin, was disoriented, he tried to remember what happened but his brain felt like it was in a fog. He looked down at his pants, he was covered in glass. Something Warm ran down his face. He put his hand to his head an when he pulled it away it was covered in blood. He could hear people running and the far off sound of sirens............

Austin woke in a cold sweat from the same nightmare that had plagued him for the last month. He always woke up with Abby screaming for him to help her. He ran his hand over his face and looked at his sweet little two year old Daughter lying beside him. At least she was getting some sleep.

He was worried sick about her. She wasn't the same, happy go lucky little girl she had been before the accident. He was still on leave of absence from the clinic. Abby was so upset all the time, she didn't want him out of her sight and She woke up every night screaming and crying for him. He knew it wasn't healthy but he found it easier to let her sleep with him. He could do something he hadn't been able to do month ago, comfort her.

She had lost so much; they all had. At least she was young enough, maybe with time she would forget the accident and everything she went through. If only he could. He blamed himself for the accident. There were so many things that he could of done different. The biggest one, not letting his five year old Daughter Ally, sit in the front seat. Just like Haley, he had a hard time telling Ally "no". If he would of told her no, there was a good chance she would of survived, and Wouldn't of been crushed by the Airbag. Only thing that gave him some comfort was knowing Ally and A.J didn't suffer.

His other little girl Alisha wasn't as lucky. Haley was so afraid that Alisha would die, before he came out of surgery that she had her put on life support. The doctors told her that Alisha was brain dead, but Haley didn't want to hear it. Even when he tried to tell her, she begged him not to let them take her off life support. He gave in, putting it off for a month. That's where Haley was . Sitting in Alisha's hospital room, praying for a miracle. The miracle he knew would never come. Why hadn't he been stronger? Why hadn't he insisted that they take her off life support? Because Haley had looked at him with tears in her eyes. An just like Ally, he couldn't tell her "no".

Thanks to the trucker, who decided to drive drunk, there was so many things he was going to miss out on with Ally and Alisha. The first father-daughter dance, their first date. Putting the fear of god in their first serious boyfriend. Then the day when he would give them to the man they would marry. As much as he loved all his little girls and would give anything to have Ally and Alisha back. A.J. was his first son. Like all dads; there were things that he dreamed of doing with A.J. Playing catch, going fishing, working on his first car together.

Austin sat up . Today was going to be the hardest thing either of them did, to pull the plug and watch their little girl take her last breath. Austin knew it wasn't Alisha, hooked to the machine. she had died the night of the accident. He wasn't worried he knew what to expect. It was Haley who had him worried. She had convinced herself that Alisha would breathe on her own after the machine was unplugged. .

His stomach started to churn, and the acid burned his gut. Austin knew he had to be strong. There was no more putting it off . The longer he let Haley keep her on life support, the harder it would be to let her go. Plus there were three little kids who needed Alisha's organs to live. As much as he didn't want to take his little girl off life support, he wasn't going to be responsible for another childs death.

Austin got up and slipped on his shoulder sling. His dislocated shoulder and four broken ribs were still slowing him down. He looked over a Abby. She was rubbing the sleep out her eyes. As soon as she saw him, she got up on her knees and reached for him. Austin smiled. she was one of the bright spots in his life right now. Using his good arm, he scooped her up and carried her down stairs.

Haley was in Alisha's room, washing her face and arms with a cool cloth. Talking to her like there was nothing wrong, with the beautiful four year old. She heard that someone in a coma could hear people talking around them. She asked Austin, with him being a Doctor, she figured he could tell her. But he told her he didn't know. She knew that Austin didn't want her to get her hopes up, he tried to tell her this was no longer Alisha, that she had died the night of the accident.

Even though she agreed with Austin, that if Alisha wasn't any better in a month, they would unplug the machines. She didn't know if she could do it. Haley wiped the tear off her face and looked at the clock, Austin would be there in few min, with Abby and their best friends Colin and Jessica Ryder and Logan and Ray Ann Samuals.

"There that feels better doesn't it sweetie? Daddy and Abby will be here soon, along with uncle Colin and Uncle Logan and Aunt Jessie and Aunt Ray Ann. I know you don't want to miss seeing them. Wont you open your eyes for me sweet heart? We really miss you. Please honey."

Haley was so busy talking to Alisha that she didn't even hear Austin and them walk into a room. He walked up behind her and placed his hand on her shoulder, and she jumped. she slipped into his free arm and laid her head on his chest.

" I have a really good feeling about this. She going to breath on her own, and then shes going to wake up, and we are going to have our little girl back."

" Honey"...

Haley could hear it in his voice, he didn't believe that Alisha would be ok. She pulled away from him. "She will, you will see. Where' s the Doctor? I want to get this over with. I want to prove to you that I am right."

Austin could see, no matter what he said she wouldn't listen. He just hoped that it didn't cause her to have a nervous break down when she realized he had been telling her the truth. He handed Abby to Logan " OK, Honey. Ok." He said pulling her back into his arms

The Doctor and a couple nurses came in . The Doctor looked at Austin. He nodded that they were ready to let her go. They unhooked all tubes and lines, pulling the breathing tube out last. Haley left Austins arms and walked over to the bed, her eyes never leaving the Alishas chest, waiting for her to prove Austin wrong. The heart beats held for a second, then slowly started going down. It didn't take long for Alisha to flat line.

"NO NO NO NO" Haley said rushing to Alisha, She stroked her hair and rubbed her chest. Please honey breath, breath for mommy."

Austin went and pulled her to him, but Haley Jerked away and started beating him in the chest.

"NO, YOU DO SOMETHING. YOU ARE A DOCTOR, YOU FIX HER. YOU FIX HER. YOU SON OF A BITCH. YOU SAVE KIDS ALL THE TIME, WHY WON'T YOU SAVE OUR DAUGHTER. IF YOU WOULD OF TRIED HARDER YOU COULD OF SAVED ALL OF THEM. ITS YOUR FAULT AND I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR LETTING MY BABIES DIE!

The statement felt like a blow to the gut. She said out loud, all the things he"d been thinking. He knew she didnt mean it, that it was the grief talking, but his head, told him she was right. He should of tried harder. If he hadn't been so wrapped up in his thoughts, he might of seen the semi, before it hit them. If he had taken the SUV instead of his new double cab truck, there would of been plenty of air bags and seats in back. The acid in his stomach, erupted and he suddenly felt very sick,

Austin didn't say a word, he turned and walked to the door. Logan and Colin tried to stop him, but he shrugged off their hands. The one person in the world he needed right now, just told him that he was the reason their kids died. She was right, it was his fault. As much as she hated him right now, he hated himself more.