D*A*R*E TV

D*A*R*E TV.

A man walks naked, cool as a cucumber if you'll excuse the pun, from
his doorstep to a busy department store in the centre of town. The
girl, in stilettos behind the till, blushes, drops her gaze and blushes
again as the man buys just a pair of socks. He leaves the store and
walks slowly home, oblivious to the roaming eyes and wolf whistles of
his fellow pedestrians. Welcome to the exciting world of D*A*R*E
TV.

The glass quivers silently in Larry Mullahy's right hand. Ian takes a
deep breath and repeats himself, more loudly this time, 'Fuck my ass
you monkey fannies'. The glass loops weightlessly through the
smoke-filled air towards Ian, but before its arrival his entire frame
is lifted off the ground by a series of punches from the giant man
standing next to him. The bar to the rear of the Iron Duke pub is
probably one of the least advisable places to insult your companion
drinkers. Welcome to the exciting world of DARE TV.

For the big prize, Louisa Bird picked up the ornate looking, antique
rifle. It was heavy and shook awkwardly in her hands. As she dropped a
silver, showbiz bullet into the chamber, the spotlights made it shine
like a star in her hand. She closed her eyes and paused for a second; a
centimetre one way and she would live, a centimetre the other and she
would be paralysed or even die. She tried to make up her mind. Life
certainly wasn't worth living without money, the same job day in and
day out, her present friends were boring and her flat was too small for
comfort, she had the will to travel and the need to be splayed across
the pages of a glossy lifestyle magazine. Besides, if she ever had to
go to work in that stinking office again she'd probably kill herself
anyway. That settled it. The studio audience oohed and ahhhed as she
struggled to position the muzzle of the rifle in her mouth. She
hesitated for another half a second and pulled the trigger. Welcome to
the exciting world of D*A*R*E TV.