Visitor

Visitor

I'm a star. I could have had my choice in men...I had millions at my
door, begging to come in, night after night, trying to prove to me why
they should even get a look in. I wouldn't even have given them the
time of day, even if they could. I'm bigger than they are.

I left my apartment for a few nights, and I had to face the world
again, after making myself strong enough, although my energy and my
patience were running out fast. I didn't have enough time to do the
things I wanted to do. It was a warm and dark night, and I wanted
nothing more to just curl up and die, but I kept moving as if I had no
will of my own.

Crowds of men streamed out of the clubs, they all look the same to me.
All singing the blues, and I'm just seeing red. I just wanna get where
I'm going. But then there was one man, he didn't look so strange, and
though he looked like all the others, he seemed to exhude this power, a
strength and I was drawn to him, like fluid, and I saw a familiarity in
him...

We danced a little. All else just faded into the darkness - nothing
was. Just us. And we danced some more until he led me further and
further, . My sisters are locked up indoors, and envious, some of my
sisters are dead - locked up or dead, they never had the chance. I've
got the chance tonight, and I am going to take it, this may be my last.
All the time I thought I was going down the same road as my sisters
until my release, this is my big moment to shine. I feel at liberty, I
have no one to answer to and I don't have to go where I'm going to
tonight. This guy seems to offer me more. He
is something. I glance down at his body. He has a small tattoo - "X".
We neither speak, nor bother with the introductions, and I know what it
means for myself. I show him my tattoo. "X". And then he says to me
"Little girl" and I surrender to him. We magnetise against the wall and
this visitor is here to stay. "Little girl," he says. "Little
girl".

Although he made me into a woman, I remained a little girl.