Of God and His Kingdom

God and his kingdom are a burden to bear—heavier than a cross and the greatest cause of despair. My existence is tattered by what I see and believe. The only solution to the end is my heart daily grieved.

A sword, a sword, most terrible and serrated, had caused my life, my ever troubled life, to be a life eternally sedated. A cry, a cry, inside my head, had said to me, “Be free." It was only then that I had ever known that freedom began with me.

So I closed the book and opened the book, my eyes bright with excitement. There was no power so great, so strong, that could e're quench my enlightenment.

A spark so tiny then a flame so bright have cleared up my most stormy night. With heartbreak and lament I have sung my song, wondering, fretting, if I could be wrong.

What a waste, a pure waste, of my existence with a million strings attached, the open door to my life, eternally bonded, is tighter than the tightest closed hatch. A foolish man once told me, and a foolish man will say: “Others give themselves to money and love, but I give myself to Christ everyday."

O foolish man, O blind man, do you know the things you say? It should be I who am the one to say, “My friend, my brother, give yourself at least to love today." O poor man, O simple man, do you know the things you say? The very way which you say is Truth has caused me abundant dismay.

So I proclaim to myself with more confidence than with what I have ever spoken before, “Observe virtue, observe wisdom, then just wait for what's in store. For there is so much more, and so much to know, than if there is a god dwelling in the heavens whom I have never seen nor known."