Full fathom five

By alphadog1

Fri, 23 Jan 2015
  • 854 reads
4 comments
 

 

The skin of the sea 
Is crinoline 
But its flesh is cold 
And bones go soft 
With corrosion.
Time causes ocean fold 
Its here that he meets you 
He greets you 
Before he eats you 
Devouring you 
With little or no recompense.
And in the depths, rests his crust
The bones beneath his flesh
I see his soul. 
It rests in the blue of his eye 
Not a tear here do I spy 
Instead a creaked cracked smile 
As the nymphs slowly play their lyres 
In a melody unchained by time.

© adh 2015

Certificate 12
Poem

Comments

Submitted by VeraClark on

Some chilling images and your short tempo works well.Seems to change rhythm at "meet" - not sure if it is intentional. It is a really unusual metaphor for the sea, really like it.

 

Submitted by alphadog1 on

sorry for  the late reply.  I have had my head full of essays and various text books  relating to creativity and the linguistuc perspectives  of poetry analysis.  Thank you so much  for your comments.  the poem camein this  first   draft after reading both Shakespear's  version of Ariel's  song and reading Plath's  version  of the same text.  I chose to be less original in keeping to the notion  of Ariel, but, along the  way Plath and the problems  with my father's and my own  long term illness came to the surface.  

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

A disturbing, unsettling and very original image of the sea, I love that you've shown me something new.

Submitted by alphadog1 on

sorry for  the late reply.  I have had my head full of essays and various text books  relating to creativity and the linguistuc perspectives  of poetry analysis.  Thank you so much  for your comments.  the poem came in this  first   draft after reading both Shakespeare's  version of Ariel's  song and reading Plath's  version  of the same text.  I chose to be less original in keeping to the notion  of Ariel, but, along the  way Plath and the problems  with my father's and my own  long term illness came to the surface.