Laptop vs. necktop

Laptop vs. Necktop by J.B. Pravda

"You're a diplomat, representing your nation&;#8230;.get hold of
yourself" was the panicked refrain in his brain, what he geekily
nominated his 'necktop'.

Taking in the gyrating bellydancers before him, Swanson Whordley, III
felt 'it' morphing into a laptop. Control freak/geek that he was, he
activated the ganglia charged with left brain dynamics, what he termed
his failsafe program.

"Please, just contact the American Embassy&;#8230;..they'll explain
who I am" pleaded Whordley, now under arrest for indecent gestures
aimed at women of Islam.

It seemed that, in a fit of uncontrolled lustfulness, our Man in Arabia
had, superconsciously activated the section of his 'necktop' dedicated
to lapdancing, understandable, though tragic, as his orderly wetware
had waxed far too logical, freely associating the best/worst of laptop
dynamism with the dancing flooding into his overriding ocular
portals.

Abandoned by his embarrassed foreign service confreres, who had
confiscated all his identification after he had loudly announced that
he intended to father their children, irrespective of gender, he was
shot by a firing squad the next morning, wearing only the veil he had
pilfered from a frightened belly dancer, as his final wish.