Dinner for one

DINNER FOR ONE.

A one act play for voices.

(Play opens with the sound of a large organized bonfire party in
progress. Fireworks exploding, rockets, Catharine wheels, etc. and
excited children's voices, shouting, yelling, laughing. Slowly fades
and is transported by a low, moaning, bleak wind, that rises and falls
in pitch. Over this wind, a MALE voice begins to speak. The voice is
low, powerful, and obviously cultured, almost hypnotic in tone.)

MALE: 'So at last, we can sit and have our proper introductions before
dinner, but first some small diversion to entertain you? Some
philosophical discussion perhaps, to wet the appetite?'

(At this point, the wind increases in strength momentarily, howling
with a brief, powerful intensity, then fades again to its previous
level.)

MALE: 'Ah, I feel your silence indicates an acceptance of my proposal.
Good, good; let me begin then, if I may, with this interesting little
proposition. Each night as you have lain under your warm eiderdown
quilt, curled up, hiding from the welcoming night; or sat huddled by
your fireside, in the knowledge that the dark is skin close; eager and
watchful, just outside the walls of your house. A dark, amorphous
beast, a creature that swirls round; prowling, then crouched; waiting
its chance to burst in through a window: a window that may, by chance,
become undefended by the feeble electric light; that weak, man-made
sentinel, that you have set to guard. This is the time that you die;
just a little.'

(The wind howls again here, increasing in strength for a few seconds.
After this short pause the MALE begins speaking again.)

'Not so you would notice, of course.'

(A low, menacing chuckle from the MALE is heard here.)

'Death possesses that subtle art of creeping up on people. It moves
slowly, indistinctly, until one day, in innocent chance, you catch
sight of yourself in the mirror, and recoil at what you see. Yet
despite your startled panic you are compelled to move hesitantly closer
to the reflection that stares back at you with a wide-eyed horror. Is
it your imagination, or is something thriving under your papery flesh?
Some unidentified entity that has been parasitically living out an evil
and separate existence within you, unnoticed till now; and is consuming
you from within. A predatory something that you are certain is going to
tear out of its fleshy confines, at any second, and drag everything
that is left of you down, screaming into the final darkness.'

(Again, the wind roars for a couple of seconds, then returns to its
previous level.)

'But no&;#8230; wait. This is insanity! Of course there is no
monstrous creature, that writhes within you, (The words "MONSTROUS
&; WRITHES are heavily stressed in this sentence) you realize,
instinctively. It is just your own mortality, merely old age that is
working its lascivious will upon your frail, ephemeral self. Your own
internal frame is being smothered by hands as ancient as man himself,
your body is responding to a genetic call that you can not resist, and
no amount of keeping in the light will prevent the blackness from
claiming you at last. This after all, is your nature. You can not
change it, anymore than you could halt the moon in the sky, or catch a
lightening bolt in your pocket. Death is coming to claim you, and for
you, death is inevitable.'

(A soft FEMALE sob is heard. Obviously terrified.)

FEMALE: (In a very cockney accent, obviously a teenager.)
'Please&;#8230; Please, mate&;#8230; let me go.'

(The pleas go unheard, and the MALE voice continues on,
unabated.)

MALE: 'I've never worried about death much, I suppose. Don't
misunderstand me though! I have considered the subject of mortality at
some length, often wondering how one must feel when the time comes for
taking the final journey into the dark, but I have seen so much death
in my span on this earth, that I feel that it holds no mystery for me
now.'

(MALE voice that had been calm suddenly rises in pitch to a screaming
rage, almost echoing in its power&;#8230; takes on a distinctly
monstrous tone.)

MALE: 'Why must you go in fear of the night!'

(The FEMALE shrieks in startled fear at his rage. The wind howls again,
as a supplement to his voice, almost in answer, then abates once more.
There is a moment's silence, with the wind back at its previous level,
then his monologue continues. His voice is rational again, calm and
even.)

MALE: 'I can say, in all sincerity, that the night is almost my only
love: a passion to eclipse all others, if you like. At one time I saw
my love of the darkness as nothing more then a passing infatuation. But
time and events have turned what was a simple, brief dalliance into
something much, much more. I was as flimsy, pallid moth, beating its
dull, gray wings with a paper like frenzy around the heated brilliance
of the bright candle's flame; and like all creatures that have hungered
for anything of great beauty, that have strove to taste of the
forbidden fruit, eventually their desire will consume them, as indeed
it consumed me.'

(The FEMALE is heard to sob briefly here for a few seconds, still
obviously terrified and powerless before the MALE.)

'How did I gain my nature, I hear you ask? It matters little now.
Suffice to say, that one I met long, long ago saw fit to bestow a
certain glorious gift upon me. I was changed by this gift, changed
forever. I have no real regrets though. Some may say that I am a
monster, having given up my humanity for what I have now
become&;#8230; the price was high, but the rewards were great. I
felt purified after the boon was granted. I had become a hatchling; a
wonderful, terrible creature; another's creation now able to soar to
new heights of experience and pleasure; transformed from the crawling
insect that I was.'

(For a moment the sounds of the bonfire party are carried in by the
wind, obviously from a distance, then the wind drowns out the sound
again, and the other noises are drowned out. The MALE continues to
speak again.)

MALE: 'As we sit in this cold November night, the smell of bonfires is
all around us. I dislike the smell of burning. It reminds me of other
times, other places, when the same stench has wriggled its cloying,
acrid fingers into my lungs. I remember the Blitz in London.'

(Sounds of burning, buildings crashing, and bombs falling are now
heard, only faintly though, and slightly fainter the sounds of a Hitler
speech, interlaced with a Churchill one as well.)

MALE: 'I was an ARP warden then. This nighttime profession was ideally
suited to me being able to hide my true nature. Yes, the Blitz. Burning
wood, houses, trees&;#8230; corpses.'

(The W.W.II sounds fade away, after a few seconds, and the wind takes
over again.)

'I remember the sound of the coal black, scurrying rats that
pitter-pattered down the same filthy streets; squeaking and squealing.
Carrying on their backs the tiny hoping fleas, that, in their turn,
carried the plague that rolled over most of Europe, murdering over half
its people. London in the summer of 1348.'

(At this point we hear a faint sound of monks singing a mournful
Gregorian chant, accompanied by the groans and screams of dying, the
crackle of fire burning in the background, the sound of a creaky old
wooden cart&;#8230; the sounds are giving the impression of a
medieval scene.)

MALE: 'Tens of thousands dead in the city streets and surrounding
districts. The road littered with the inanimate skin covered logs that
would end their revolting physical presence in the charnel pits. The
foul, body bloated stench was in the air for months. Immune from
nature's cull, due to my nature, I helped load the carts with the
diseased corpses. It was an unsavory task.'

(The sound of bodies being hefted onto the wooden palette of the back
of a cart&;#8230; also we hear the sounds of flies buzzing. The
background noises intensify for a second, especially the fire sounds
and screams/groans etc.)

MALE: 'Some of them were still alive, you know, when they were slid
into the burning bonfire of corpses: the dying and the dead writhing
together, locked within the rhythm and music of the cleansing inferno.
But the onlookers were past the point of caring by then. They were just
glad that it was not they, but others, that had been invited to the
dance.'

(The previous sounds now fade altogether, to be replaced once more by
the wind.)

MALE: 'Man losing his humanity is not an invention of your century, let
me assure you. Like today, and the horrors and sights that assault your
sensibilities nightly on that dispassionate electronic eye to the
world; the television; immunity to other's suffering is not long in
coming. The first thing you lose when you glut on horror is the
facility to care.'

FEMALE: (Still sobbing) 'You're a nutter! Look, I ain't gonna say
nuffin', I promise&;#8230; just let me&;#8230; '

MALE: 'You think I am Mad? Why? Because we sit on the damp November
grass, in the night, amongst all these slate and marble monuments to
man's mortality? Because I tell you a little of myself, my history? Or
is it because you can not conceive that I am telling you the truth? I
was here in London in 1348, and in 1942.'

(MALE voice sounds far away, at this point. Almost with a 'dream-like'
quality. Isolated from the current events, but still talking to the
FEMALE. The voice should portray the absolute sincerity of what is
being said. Not trying to convince himself, but the audience.)

'I was in the Holy Land, or Outremer as it was called then in 1185. I
was on the march to Tiberias, travelling to the battle of Hattin with
the Christian forces, on that awful march, when men, despairing of
their God, harried on all sides by the arrows of the Infidels and dying
of thirst in the terrible desert heat, cut their own throats rather
than be captured and suffer the appalling tortures that they knew the
Turks had waiting for them. I have known the Pax Romana. I have seen
Carthage, and Babylon in all its splendor. I have been peasant,
groaning beneath the wheel and sat in the high places of kings, and
will be both again. I have seen sights that&;#8230; but, no, I
digress once more, sweet one&;#8230; suffice it to say that I am
immeasurably older than you can ever imagine.'

(Sounds of the FEMALE obviously attempting to escape the MALE. MALE
voice now snaps back out of this dreamy quality, and resumes its
previous tone.)

MALE: 'No! Do not try to run! I will hold your wrist so you can
not!'

FEMALE: (Panic and pain very evident in her voice) 'You're 'urtin'
me&;#8230; don't squeeze so 'ard&;#8230; let go of me&;#8230;
you&;#8230;'

(A brief struggle, then a terrible shriek from the FEMALE, as we hear a
sharp and graphic 'snap', as the MALE breaks the FEMALE'S wrist with
his terrible strength. The shrieks of pain continue as the MALE speaks
again.)

MALE: 'Please, try to contain yourself! Do you have to shriek so? Yes,
(with a terrible laugh) I know it is broken now! Just sit there like a
good girl, and be quiet, for a moment!'

(The MALE voice is now filled with an amused irony, obviously knowing
the FEMALE is in terrible pain, but treats it as some kind of a
perverse joke.)

'Have you no manners at all? Is this any way to act towards your genial
host, someone whom has saved you from your associates and harm at their
hands; and then takes you for dinner? Now, where was I? (A malevolent
chuckle is heard from the MALE.)

(The shrieks subside into a dull occasional moan of pain, and the
MALE'S voice continues in his sarcastic tone.)

MALE: 'Ah, yes, I remember. Those two men that you climbed into my taxi
with. You must recall them! It was the same two that had placed you on
the street corner, hours before, like refuse left out for the
collection.'

(The sound of people getting into a car, doors opening and closing,
etc. and the sound of mumbled male and female voices droning on,
indistinct, yet harsh.)

'We had a short and unpleasant journey to the seedier part of the town,
their constant demands for your meager and debased earnings never
ceased. Then, did my ears deceive me, or did you all plot in the back
of my vehicle on how you should rob me of my takings, beat me a little,
then dump me back into the street?'

(A low menacing chuckle from the MALE now, almost demonic in power and
tone.)

FEMALE: (Voice stilted in pain) 'We wouldn't 'ave 'urt ya&;#8230;
Mister&;#8230; I promise&;#8230; It was Bobbies and Bones
idea&;#8230; not mine&;#8230; honest!'

(The MALE'S tone is now almost apologetic.)

MALE: 'You misunderstand! I am not complaining; I really don't mind, my
dear! Your performances were without peer for they're sheer ineptitude!
(Another evil chuckle is heard here.) Most amusing! I especially liked
it when they dragged you from the back of the car, mumbling at me to
follow them for the fare, as they had left their cash in an upstairs
flat, which was contained in the dismal gray block that was nestled
amongst other dismal gray blocks, each indistinguishable from their
fellows. There is no need to apologize. I surmised the blatant intent
at once, but I played the farcical charade out till the end with you
all. I found that it suited my purpose quite well. We entered a
lift&;#8230;'

(The sound of lift doors opening and closing, then the lift groaning
its way upward.)

&;#8230;'that was urine painted and graffiti splashed, and it
wheezed its way asthmatically up to the seventh floor. Out of the
lift&;#8230;'

(The sound of lift doors opening, then the sound of three pairs of feet
echoing hollowly down a concrete corridor.)

&;#8230;'and down a dim hall with peeling paint, finally through a
cracked door and into a damp and dingy flat that smelled of stale,
spicy cooking, and the unpleasant odor of unwashed women. You played
your part best of all though, as the men had constantly pinched and
slapped you all the way there, with an occasional vicious tug of your
hair, just to break the monotony; their constant demands for 'their'
money never ceasing. They played this part with the most conviction, I
felt. Once inside, and the door was closed, the bigger one came up
behind me with the obligatory craft knife that he had produced from his
well worn leather jacket, and held the sharp triangular steel blade to
my thin throat, whilst the smaller one began to methodically search my
pockets for what they could steal. Both were well practiced in their
art.'

(The wind begins to get a little louder now, howling just a little
more. There is the sound of very distant thunder.)

MALE: 'They were easy to dispose of, I suppose. But I had to be quick,
unable to savor the moment of death. People might have heard, and I
could not allow them to scream or cry out too loudly. That would never
do! The look of incredulity on all your faces was intense; the
fragility of their human flesh was matched only by their weakness of
spirit.'

(Sounds of fight now, brief yet brutal.)

MALE: 'I lifted the bigger man up off the floor&;#8230;'

(Sounds of grunts and gasps&;#8230; the sound of someone trying to
plead and beg as they are obviously being choked.)

&;#8230;'his legs kicking and scrabbling in the air, only stilled
when the fingertips of my right hand touched briefly together, like a
secret meeting of illicit lovers, in his larynx, through the holes that
I had torn there with them&;#8230;'

(A gurgling, smothered scream is heard here.)

&;#8230;'His accomplice tried, not unnaturally, to flee; but I
reached over and tore the scalp from his scurrying head&;#8230; with
the same ease that you would peel a piece of soft, overripe
fruit.'

(Second scream is heard, one consisting of a mixture of high-pitched
agony and stark terror.)

MALE: 'I thought that the white of his scull contrasted beautifully
with the rich, red, ruby of his blood. A small masterpiece of my
creation, in an otherwise gray, small world. Sadly, however, I had not
the time to admire my piece, as I would have wished. I merely tossed
his stinking corpse into a dark corner of that fetid room, before
lifting your stunned carcass under my arm, and hurrying here, to this
nice secluded spot, to keep our dinner engagement.'

(FEMALE begins to sob, realizing that she has no escape. The MALE'S
voice takes on a cooing quality, as if soothing a small child.)

MALE: 'No, no my love&;#8230; do not cry!

(MALE voice changes again to a distinctly monstrous one&;#8230;
powerful and demonic.)

MALE: 'Be content in the knowledge that your blood has helped to
sustain the oldest, and dare I venture to suggest, the most moral of
God's creatures&;#8230; the vampire!'

(Thunder roars.)

MALE: 'And now I grant you release from your tawdry little
existence.'

FEMALE: 'Oh&;#8230; God help me&;#8230;'

MALE: 'No! Do not struggle. Try to maintain some dignity, at the end!
Rip the throat. Ah, there it is&;#8230; delicious! I am so hungry
tonight; and I never dine alone.'

(Wind dies down, and the fireworks party comes back into the fore. Just
under this, is another sound, quiet, though clearly audible. The sound
of the FEMALE'S blood being lapped and sucked up by the MALE.)

SOUND FADES TO SILENCE.