HOW ANY TEAM CAN WIN THE SUPER BOWL

Believe me, you don't have to be a sports fan to appreciate this
article.
HOW ANY TEAM CAN WIN THE SUPERBOWL
In all of the wide wide world of sports, no prize is more coveted than
the Super Bowl Trophy. For decades rugged men have battled on the
gridiron each Sunday with hopes of winning a Super Bowl ring.
Of all the sports that ever were, Football is considered the Manliest!
And, manly men favor manly sports. It's manly to be manly!
Football is a unique blend of individual abilities linked in a team
scenario. Great players can shine, but never on their own. The entire
team must contribute superbly on every play. A touchdown run of 99
yards can be nullified because someone on the other side of the field
did something illegal.
Coaches stay awake at night devising strategies to overpower the other
team. More often than not the results of these plans are determined by
the execution of them. A fired-up team can run basic plays over and
over again successfully, while the best laid plans of mice and men
often go astray when done poorly.
Poor execution is usually due to lack of concentration and desire.
Coaches must keep their people "Fired-Up"
On any given day, any team can beat another. Usually the team that's
"UP" for the game will be victorious. It's a mind game, purely
psychological! Control the mind and the body will follow.
Football minds are controllable. Sure, they went to college, but they
majored in things like, "Arithmetic". The key to defeating them is
controlling their minds and keeping them from being "Intense".
I got news for ya! Here's my secret, sure-shot, can't fail, 100\% risk
free, money back guarantee plan for winning the Super Bowl in one year.
It's quite simple, actually! Pick a team, any team, and change a few
things.
First, change the name of the team. Obviously menacing names like
Bears, Lions, and Panthers don't work. Change the name to something
like, "Pansies".
Think about it, "The Pittsburgh Pansies". Does that name strike fear in
you? How could anyone "Get up" for playing such a team?
Next, change the uniforms. Give them pink shirts...Hot Pink! Trousers
can be white. Remove strips and replace them with rows of posies.
Helmets will be white with a big pink pansy on either side, trimmed in
lace.
Wide receivers should wear fancy mittens instead of gloves.
Remove the turf from the playing field and replace it with clover. Use
rows of white flowers for the yardlines, and grow gardens in the
endzones. Spell out "PANSIES" in a multitude of colored flowers.
Adorn visiting locker rooms with flower arrangements. Cover walls with
photos of pixies and fairies. Employ a bathroom monitor to insure
opposing players, "put the seat down".
Before the coin-toss, Pansy Players hug their opponents instead of
shaking hands.
Stadium speakers play classical music as announcers read poetry.
Before the first play from scrimmage, Pansy Linemen arise from their
three point stance and hand a flower to their counterparts.
Players on the bench throw petals into the air as others frolic
about.
Fans in the stands throw bouquets and display "PEACE" signs. Instead of
The Wave, they due a Minuet. Men lift their shirts revealing flower
tattoos, (I have no objection to women doing the same).
Serve bottled Perrier to opposing players, instead of Gatorade.
Replace The Goodyear Blimp with a giant colorful butterfly hotair
balloon.
Remove injured players on a stretcher shaped like a swan, adorned with
flowers. Spray bruises with lilac scented remedies.
When players take a "Time Out" they have to sit on the bench and not
talk to anyone until they "calm down".
Imagine the opposing coach in the locker room before the game, "All
right men?We gotta be tough! We gotta be mean! We gotta play hard!
Cause we're playing The Pansies!"
There isn't a team in the world that could get fired-up to play such a
team.
Adapt these minor changes and I guarantee any team a Super Bowl victory
the very first year. They may even go undefeated!