I - Entry for 03/08/28

Thursday, August 28, 2003
24+6

Days until the weekend: 1
Days until the dentist: 7
Working days until Maternity leave 31
Sex Drive: 0 (Poor Bear)

I am still feeling the black gloomy fog of the last few days but have
decided to try and put a brave baby bear face on things.

I feel sorry for poor old bear. Reflecting on last night, I can not be
the easiest person in the world to live with at the moment and I don't
think I have quite got used to having him around all the time again, as
lovely as it is.

It's so easy to be angry at him, to take things out on him that have
nothing to do with him, just because he happens to be in my way, poor
lamb. Let's just put it down to hormones, eh?

Last night at about 2am the dog decided he wanted to go out. I threw on
my tracky bottoms and my slippers and to take him down the stairs to
the flat gardens for what I thought would be a quick pee.

But the bugger decided to take off into the town centre to the nearby
river. Thank god I didn't bump into anyone, I must have looked a right
state.

Baby Bear: half asleep, half dressed, bump hanging out, no glasses
(blind as a bat without them) and waking half the neighbours screeching
after the dog.

Nice.

Mind you when I did finally get back to bed, I got a cuddle from Bear
(who had previously fallen out with me, and was giving me the cold
shoulder) who thought I have a heart of gold.

I thought everyone knew that!

It took about an hour to get back to sleep because all the excitement
woke up Sprog and my bump was going wibble-wobble, but I don't feel as
shattered today.

It's strange - before, the baby's movement was like big bubbles popping
under my skin but now I can actually feel a little creature under
there, which makes my whole bump change shape

In 15 weeks, I guess it's going to make our whole lives change shape
too.

BB xx