Joke that is cruel

I can only try to help you see my dream as it is one that leaves me
short of speech,
Imagine a warm surreal sandy beach, on an Ireland that lies somewhere
between life and that dreamy retreat where you and your soul mate will
meet.
In the Palm trees you can find shelter, water and food to eat,
You will have there no needs but one, and that could bring a master to
his knees,
You will be alone just as nature intended, as you cannot bring a friend
not even one in need,
This is after all only my dream, my solitary retreat,
Empty is the fullest of plates when you are the only seat at a banquet
laid out for the whole world to take place,
Or worse for them to watch you chew in anguish at every bite, stop
eating and you will die, that goes against what I am in the deepest
regions of my mind,
This place at times could make me cry,
Not from sadness but from an empty side of bliss in its most
selfishness,
I am here to face my own destructiveness, tested and won I am one with
no one,
I see beyond your front and guns, who do you hide from? could it be the
glare of the Sun,
Or are you scared to look at your heart, what will be done will be
done, will you despair if you do not fair the best with the flare as
you have boosted to have with some to spear,
Do you see what is in my dream that I have hidden well in this place
that makes me want to scream,
Life will not last forever, but if it could it would be hell have no
fear.
Not my heart, body, mind or soul can I in this world any more call my
own,
But in a place where solitude is all, there is no wind to help decide
your direction of sail,
And all that is left behind is a frail emotion called loneliness see
how it prevails, here you can turn sadness to a secure feeling of
immortal-ness.
I guess that is the strength that comes from independence, but what is
to become of creation with no want to be dependant, there must come a
time when blind I must go to find what is by nature mine to
define.
I am the one that will eclipse the Sun, my ambition has told me need no
one,
My heart died when I believed that lie, all I have now, my mind, my
sight, I wish I was blind, what have I lost what have I done, where
have I been, what will be, will be done.
I have become an aspiring no one, greatness a past illusion that
drifted off and floats within the horizon,
A cruel joke.