U) Shame

SHAME

The house in Charles Street
with a streak of white below a bedroom window
where my father hurled a can of paint
a tiny sooty terrace
with a shared loo in the yard
my slowly blinking grandad chopping sticks
with an axe on the hearth

here I was carried when my mother ran away
slept in grandma's room
for the first time saw her unpin her bun of silver
to tumble down and down and down
right to her ankles
scoop it over her left shoulder
and comb and comb and comb
in candlelight

at sixteen after football with my firm
I stroll up Charles Street with two Cambridge Blues
turning my eyes from grandma's house
praying nobody'll call me from within