Zero Cash Dangerous Place

Body clock woke me at 6.20 - wash up - hand in key &; off to the
airport for my first flight of the day to Caracas. There is an airport
tax of 800 Bs. I only had 5,000 Bs notes.

'NO CAMBIO'

'What, it's only a fiver.'

I had to pop out of the airport, hassle a few taxi drivers, arepa
sellers &; petrol attendants before I found sufficient change. If
only a fiver were such a grand figure in Blighty. Delayed a couple of
hours due to cloud cover over the surrounding mountains. Good call, I
don't want us ploughing into the side of one of those babies. Also
means I don't have to loiter around Caracas for too long. I think after
I've eaten something there, it'll be time to book in. Perfecto.

Maybe not. On arrival I realise I've got a six hour wait for my flight
in Caracas. Wouldn't be so bad, but within 4 minutes of sitting down,
I've been approached by 3 beggars. This could be quite
trying&;#8230;

And how trying it was. The fuckers have upped the airport tax to ?24.
?24!!! Yet again the curse of the visa electron struck. I attempted in
vain to sell my trousers, shirts, pants, etc. to make up the extra
cash. Just continually ignored by any authority after a while. Had to
sell my walkman for a mere fiver to cover the tax. Couldn't think of
any other way through. For the first time this holiday, I am annoyed.
Very annoyed. An imminent law suit against the Co-Op bank is due for
lying about the accessibility of my funds. Mother fuckers. As soon as I
made it through customs, I bumped into Bettmar &; Alex. Two
Venezuelan birds I met last year. They are on their way to New York.
Pretty crazy really. Caracas is a big town. Coincidence or did the
magician plan this?

My god though, they weren't exactly angelic looking last year - now
they have put on hundreds of pounds &; look positively yeti like.
Still, after the trials of the past couple of hours, it was nice to see
familiar, friendly faces. I just hope Keels' friend is at the airport
to meet me, otherwise I'll have to disturb the poor chap in his class
to get the money for the cab fare. Well, another walkmanless three hour
delay &; eventually reached Bogota at 10pm. It was quite worrying.
Each minute delay, basically meant Keels' mate wouldn't be at the
airport &; Keels wouldn't be in his class. I had no money &; was
arriving in one of the most violent cities in the world &; needed to
meet my friend somehow.

Obviously, there was nobody at the airport when I finally reached the
Bog, so I approached some local &; asked him for some cash, so as I
could phone Keels. Luckily, he obliged &; sorted out the call. Yes
-yes - yes -daddio. He was still at work. Gonna get a cab there. Gave
the kind chap the few Bolivars I had left (5p) &; got a cab from a
security guaranteed cab stall. Wicked man - met up with Keels, he paid
the cabbie, read a couple of e-mails - my housing problem is sorted in
Blighty - FP the Mule - there's a room in Camberwell, round his
pad.
Keels had previously sorted out a good amount of herbage for ?1.50,
(shows I was ripped of in Venezuela), so we ambled over to the
apartment block, where he lives.

Lovely - he's done himself proud. Plenty of ethnic ceramics &;
materials adorn the walls &; floors of his pad. Nuff' wood &;
plants.

Tump up, Bacardi &; coke, plenty of pizzas &; gibber. The good
chap has also sorted out the cashflow problem. Love up with dub big
time. $1000 &; ?200 worth of pesos. Both very excited about pending
trip - Monday morning we leave. Stayed up until 5.30. Ain't gonna get
up early tomorrow. And I kept repeating 'Know what I mean' &; 'You
know'. It got a tad trying I must admit.

Spooned it up with dub.