Another Early Winter

By AtTheBottomOfTheBox

Sun, 24 Feb 2008
  • 580 reads
2 comments
 

She'd scurried through the little gate
Late in autumn when her tree was bare
The taut bark between her teeth
The pock beneath her tiny paws
Standing defiant and proud
Dwarfing doubt; waiting to take her weight.
Tying a knot
Checking it twice.
Remembering balls she hasn't been to
Cars she'll never drive

The kestrel overhead spys a swinging feast
Drops with swingless ease.

Certificate U
Poem
Other Non-fiction

Comments

Submitted by camilla on
I am a little confused by this. I thought it was about the suicides in Wales but then there is a dog reference "tiny paws".The subject and title Another Early Winter is good I think it could be made a bit more of.

 

Submitted by AtTheBottomOfTheBox on
Thanks for this and you're right to think it was inspired by the suicide spate. It is a work in progress like everything I've done (it's already changed quite a bit overnight), the paws reference being her imagined as a little mouse, to tie in with "scurried" (and originally her small voice and a moment at the end where she was carried off, as in death). I'm torn at the moment between clarity and obliqueness but am trying not to spell things out too clearly since I enjoy the pondering as much as the understanding when I'm looking at others work and am also keen on the idea that poems can transcend their original meanings in the spaces you leave.