One Single Raindrop

One Single Raindrop

Countless raindrops are falling outside
I intently listen
The rains fall hard
Then gently to the earth
What is the message they bring?
Each a word
Each a tear
Each seeking out its place.

Sitting in confusion
Asking why and how so many times
Yet, I still have no answer
Could I find them in the rain
In the thunder
Or
darkened sky?

I went outside
Into the rain
It was cold
raindrops fell in darkness
They sought my face
And covered tears of my own
I turned my eyes to the skies
Starring at the lighting
And feeling the deep rolling thunder
Beneath my feet

I walked
My soul was in this storm
Crying out to be found
I searched.
The cold and damp
Ached throughout my body
The rain pounded my heart
My God where have I gone?

Could I possibly see the difference
Between want and need
Between real and imagined
Could I learn to accept a new form of love?
Can my heart go unbroken?
Would I find the answer in the storm?

Saturated throughout
I walked
I began to see
Rain left me cold
My feet covered in mud
My heart more empty than before
Tears of rain
Still more forceful than my own
In this storm were answers
Yet my soul still wandered.

I walked back to my home
Greeted by warmth
But also by emptiness
I lay across my bed
The filth of muddied feet
Stained clean sheets
The tears of rains
Left wet all I touched and laid upon
My own tears covered my face.

I didn't know the answers
Or any reasons why
I felt more cold and empty
More soulless than before
This time I lay upon my bed
Filthy
Cold
Still alone
Nothing is different
There has been no change
No answers in the storm.

I still reach for him
Ache to be held by him
Hear his voice
Still
I don't.
I want my tears to stop
I can't seem to make them go away
Looking at the ceiling
Seeking
One single answer
In one single raindrop.