Lids
By carpenter_t
- 196 reads
Lids
Thomas Carpenter
class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> From
the moment I moved this morning I knew that it was going to be one of
those days. As
my partner the bottom lid and I opened to let light into the eye to
wake up the brain I heard it scream. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "Turn off the
light. Turn
off the light.
It's too bright." style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> We, the right eyelids
blinked and moistened the eye for the first of many
times.
The receptors in the eye said, "That's sunlight coming
through the curtains.
We can't turn it off." The message was passed back to the brain
which became quiet.
brain.
"I'm blind.
I'm blind in one eye." The left eyelids had not moved. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "I'm blind," the brain
screamed again.
The central part of the brain said, "Don't be
daft. The lids
are stuck with sleep that's all". The brain became hysterical, "The lids are
stuck, the lids are stuck.
I'm blind."
brain. "Just
send a message to your hand to wipe the eye lids and everything will be
fine."
"Are you sure?" the brain asked in a quivering
voice.
"Trust me," said the
centre.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> So a
series of electrical impulses passed along thousands of pathways and
the message reached the hand which wiped the left eyelids and they
opened.
"Oh," said the brain as light entered through the
eye. Then it
screamed, "Turn off the light! Turn off the light!"
no," central brain sighed, "Not again." class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Ah,
wait a minute.
Its just sunlight," said the brain. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "I'm alright, it's
okay. Don't
panic."
"I wasn't," the central brain replied.
all four eyelids were working together, blink, moisten, blink,
moisten.
And then something terrible happened.
"Argh.
I can see.
I can see," yelled the eyes. Now this caused a great deal of
consternation, as the human owner was very short
sighted.
"It's a miracle. It's a miracle," said the eyes.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "It must have happened
whilst we slept."
"Don't be daft," said all parts of the brain in a
remarkably calm tone.
"There has to be a perfectly reasonable
explanation.
Now what could it be?"
eyes.
"Shut up," said the brain. "Let me think."
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> A message went to the
hand which came up to the face.
back from the hand.
"Obstruction in front of the face. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Feels like
glasses."
"I don't believe it," said the brain.
"What is it?
What is it?" the eyes demanded urgently. class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes">
"Well," said the brain, "It would seem that the stupid
human fell asleep with his glasses on. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "So no miracle then,"
said the eyes sadly. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "No. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> No miracle," said the
brain.
"Pity," said the eyes
blinked and moistened, blinked and moistened. class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes">
"Time to get up," said the brain. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Get washed, dressed,
get some breakfast.
There's a whole day ahead. Come on. Up. Up. UP." class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun:
yes">
The whole body moved and the eyes found themselves looking
down at the floor.
style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT:
200%"> style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> The feet wriggled their
toes in greeting.
The eyes felt the skin around them crinkle as the face
smiled back at the toes. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%">
"Argh.
Argh.
ARGH," screamed the front two sections of
brain
"What is it now," asked central brain.
36.0pt"> "We
hurt," the front sections said in a whinging voice. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> class="MsoHeader" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; tab-stops:
36.0pt"> "What
do you mean, you hurt?"
"Well,
we hurt. We
sort of ?. Ache."
Front sections replied. It sounded as though they were going to cry
so the eyes began to get wetter in readiness.
"Don't be daft," said the brain in control mode. "Stand
up."
"Oh dear, we don't think that we can."
"Stand UP."
Central brain was in forceful mode. class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes">
"Do we have to?" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "Yes" class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes">
The human stood up, seemed to sway and sat back
down.
"Oh Oh," said a feeble voice from way down in the
stomach. "I
don't feel very well.
I think I'm going to be urgh, urgh."
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Whereupon the stomach
was sick all over the feet and the floor.
"Ugh," the feet moaned. "Disgusting." class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> The
eyes looked down and saw the toes surrounded by a grey coloured lumpy
liquid mess.
"Oh dear."
They said together. This was followed by, "What on earth is
that?"
"What," said the brain.
next to the feet.
It looks like its got fur on it and it's
moving!"
"Fur?" Said the stomach. "Moving? I don't remember eating anything like
that.
"Not through me you didn't," said the
mouth.
"Wait a minute," the eyes focused.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "It looks like the
kitten."
"The KITTEN," shouted the stomach.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Oh my God.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I ate the
kitten."
"Not through me you didn't," repeated the mouth beginning
to get very worried.
calming voice of central brain. "Wait just a minute. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> If the stomach had
eaten the kitten, then the mouth would know about it, wouldn't
it?" This did
seem to make sense so stomach and mouth both replied,
"Yes."
"But the mouth is certain that the kitten didn't go
through there.
Is that right?"
together again.
"Then there must be some other explanation."
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Central brain
was very good at sorting out other explanations.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "How else could it
have got there?" Central brain wondered.
"Well it did NOT COME through me," said the arse
firmly.
"You are definitely not helping," central brain said to
the arse quietly.
The body became silent as central brain thought carefully.
Finally, with
a hint of mirth, central brain said, "Stomach you did not eat the
kitten."
A very relieved but somewhat unconvinced stomach said, "I
didn't?"
Central brain said, "No. What you did do was empty your contents
over the kitten which was obviously on the floor by the human's
bed."
There was a short silence as each part took in this
information.
"Oh.
That's good.
Very good," stomach now sounded relieved.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It didn't last
long. "I'm
going to be sick again."
together, "Mind the kitten.
Mind the kitten." style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> The feet could faintly be
heard calling out,
"Never mind the kitten. What about us." class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> In their
attempt to avoid a second dose of stomach contents they moved about so
much the human nearly fell off the bed. class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> When
the moment had passed and everything had settled down again, the front
brain sections repeated that they hurt. Central brain had had
enough.
"Come on.
Get up.
We can take some tablets for the ache.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Have a nice shower and
the whole body will feel better. Trust me," central brain sounded very upbeat.
style="mso-spacerun: yes">
The human stood up and walked towards the
bathroom. The
eyes guided the whole operation. At last the human stood before the bathroom
mirror. As the
eyes looked at the human reflection they both said together, "Argh,
it's horrible."
"What is?" asked the brain with an exasperated
sigh.
"That is.
That thing in front of us," said the eyes.
"That is our human. It's us you idiots," said the
brain.
"Oh," said the eyes not sounding very convinced.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Is it
really?"
"Yes," said the brain firmly.
he's ugly," the eyes said. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "He doesn't look any
different from the way he looked yesterday," brain
replied.
"He looks older," the eyes said.
is older," brain said, "One day older." class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes">
"Where did all those lines come from?" The eyes
asked.
"He's had those for years," brain replied
patiently.
"What, all of them?"
lines."
"But he never laughs," said the eyes
used to," brain said sharply beginning to lose patience. class="MsoNormal" style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Why
are we so red?" The eyes asked looking closely at
themselves.
"Well he was up half the night at that party."
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Brain was now staring
to get cross.
And he ached.
Perhaps that had something to do with all the alcohol the
human had had.
"Well, he really should take better care of us.
style="mso-spacerun: yes"> We have to last him a
long time you know," they eyes said truculently.
"Yes," brain answered really aching now. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "He really should take
better care of you." style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> "Oh no," the eyes
screamed together.
"He's got a spot." style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> Oh no, thought brain,
it's going to be one of those days. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%"> We lids blinked and
moistened, blinked and moistened. style="LINE-HEIGHT: 200%; tab-stops:
36.0pt">
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