Now That's A Weird Question

That’s a weird question. Well, I’ll tell ya, there’s not much down there. I think he’s ahh fallin off the evolutionary table if you know what I mean. Gone. Zip. Soon people will be born without em I think. Will I miss em? Nah. Why should I, he really doesn’t do a whole lot for me. He doesn’t even touch the ground for Chrissakes... Why should I care if he’s left all alone down there by himself. Who honestly cares.
Well. Here. I’ll tell ya the truth about it. It always reminds me of one thing, and one thing only, which is why it will be so easy to forget, when and if he ever falls off the evolution train. I was with this girl. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. A girl. And don’t tell this shit about everything has to do with a girl, because listen my friend, it usually does. But anyway. I was with this girl. Ahh man she was beautiful. I mean we had a great time together. Laughin, playin, talkin. And the sex. Oh I don’t even wanna go there. But I remember one particular night we was hangin out, and ya know it was one of those moments where ya just sit there with a girl. Just sit. I love that shit. When ya don’t haveta talk, but just sit. That’s good stuff. But anyway. There we was, sittin there all calm and what not, just sittin. And she asks, ‘can you wiggle it?’ I says, sometimes. Sometimes it’s hard to wiggle. I have to concentrate real hard. Or sometimes it actually just happens, I tell her. When I’m not thinkin, and it will wiggle. Then she asks, ‘well can you wiggle it for me then?’ And I tell her that I’ll try, ya know. But I aint promisin anything. So I sit there. And I sit there. And I sit. And here we are just sittin there not talkin, me concentrating, and both of us just sittin there lookin at it. Waitin for it to wiggle or just move milimeter, or somethin.
But nothin. Not even a goddamn vibration.
Hmm. Well. Things got weird wit us after that. Not that I think it had anything to do with me not bein able to wiggle it. But it was just coincidental. Our relationship just started gettin worse around that point. And no, believe me it had nothin to do with me not being able to wiggle it. It was just a coincidence. We just wanted different things by that point in our lives if you know what I mean. Things happen that way You know. Oh well.
But that reminds me though. I had a friend who could make that little guy do what ever the fuck he wanted. He’d just sit there and wiggle that guy to fuckin music. One time I watched him wiggle it like it were one of those sticks that those conductor guys use in symphonies and shit, to Beethoven’s ninth symphony. I have to say. It was one of the goddamnedist things I ever saw. Just sitting there with this thing flying all over the place to a bunch of choir people screamin at the top of there lungs, ‘Ode to Joy!’ Shit on me if ever see somethin like that again. But this guy. Let me tell ya. Was well off. Rich. Good lookin. Education. He had it all. Whatever he wanted. People really liked him. But the thing about em was that he was a good guy. A good guy. I mean he had his fault like everybody else, but he was good in the way that he didn’t care about what he had. He’d give it all away to help a friend. A good guy. I don’t see him much anymore. I don’t know why.
But anyway. That’s my answer for ya. But to tell ya the truth I don’t think about it too much. It’s weird how these things work out. Ahh whatever. But I was just wonderin. Why you askin me about my pinky toe anyway? Why don’t you tell me about your goddamn pinky toe, you fuckin pervert. Geesh...