A Calling Beyond Sympathy

A CALLING BEYOND SYMPATHY.
He was sitting in his favorite chair within the small office with her. Only the two of them. Nobody was even near the locale at this time of night. All had left early that evening. Now they'd probably be having dinner with their families and friends and lovers. Who would want to be out here in that small office in the night? He had wondered many times why he kept doing this? He always kept coming back to ask if he could do something. And they were always glad he came. The authorities. He decided maybe he just loved it so much.
Now he turned to look at her. She was staring blankly at him, probably not even seeing him. Could be something she had read in the book she was reading. It was a book about teaching a child to read. Her daughter was approaching three years old now. She would soon need to teach her to read. And when she thought about her, she also wondered why she kept coming in this little office. Why was she ready to spend the whole night with this man? He was nice, and kind. But shouldn't she be at home with her daughter? She decided maybe she just loved it so much.
They were waiting. That was their job. To wait. In case something happened.
He was actually in his work holiday but he had decided to volunteer for the service. He just wasn't used to resting at home. He always had to be doing something, and it had to do with helping people out.
She was not a volunteer. She was employed by the city to do this job. The job of waiting. She was thinking about quitting one of these days, she had told him. Her husband was putting too much pressure on her, she said.
" Is your brother coming by bus or by train? she suddenly asked.
He had told her his young brother would be coming to visit him. She had met him several times before, when he had come to visit his big brother.
" By train, he should be arriving in the early morning, Sadi replied.
" It could as well be tomorrow evening. You know how the trains are in this country. They will delay you if you are lucky enough that they haven't cancelled your trip, Mili remarked.
" Yes, due to unavoidable circumstance, they'd say. I wonder if the unavoidable circumstances only happen in this country and particularly in government offices. What's wrong with us?
" People are just not serious, that's all, Mili commented.
" How does one overcome that?
" I have no idea. We might be given aids, grants, loans and all that, but there are issues right here that we have to deal with, otherwise this fight against poverty won't get anywhere.
And so minutes and hours were going by slowly. It was a quiet and beautiful night, the soothing silence occasionally disturbed by the buzz of the radio as it received incomprehensible signals from all over. It was the instrument that they would pay attention to, in case it announced something intelligible.
" I wish there were a system whereby one could tell if something bad would happen anytime.
" What for? Mili wondered, taking her eyes from the book.
" So that we would know and be prepared.
She thought about that for a moment.
" It would only make people miserable. Imagine for instance that you know that tomorrow you are going to be hit by a train?
" Yes, that's right. But it could be just for us, paramedics. Not for everybody else. In nights like this, if the machine told us beforehand that there won't be any casualties, instead of wasting all this time waiting, not knowing if you'd be really needed or not, you could go to your husband.
" And you to your lovely girlfriend, she added.
" She hates my job.
" My husband even more.
" What is so hard to understand? Sadi asked.
" The fact that you could love them and still not always be with them, I think
" What is so hard about that? Do you have to always be with the one you love? Going wherever they go. That is actually not necessarily love. That is more like stalking, Sadi remarked .
" And one could get years in jail for stalking.
" You know, she actually threatened me once, he said.
" That she would to kill you?
" No, she is not that bad. She threatened to leave me, if I don't quit this job.
" You didn't succumb, did you?
" No, I wouldn't be here now.
" I love you, Sadi. You can stand up for something you believe in. So what did you tell her?
" I just wanted her to think of all the people who needed my service.
" At least she understood, my husband cannot. We are fighting almost every week.
" That's better. I fight almost everyday, he informed her.
" I think I will have to leave you though. With my second baby coming he definitely won't understand it.
" I won't understand it either. You have to take care of the baby.
" You are on his side now? I thought we were together in this, she said.
" I am on your side, that's why I care about your children.
" Alright.
It was quiet again for a moment.
" Hey, about that idea of being able to tell if something bad is going to happen, could it really be realistic? I mean, assume I am told that I am going to get an accident in a car, say at five, tomorrow afternoon. If I don't get in the car at that particular time, it won't happen, right?
" I wonder, she thoughtfully replied, " but maybe you wouldn't be able not to. It's like you know that cigarettes kill, yet you smoke them. So you will know and yet you will act accordingly. Or else the machine has to be less specific. Like, it might predict an accident but not saying when or how exactly in that particular day.
" You know, it's just as well we don't know the future. Most of us would be just fighting against it if we knew what was coming and forget to enjoy the present.
" I agree, Mili nodded.

"Hey, I just remembered. Your brother is a teacher, isn't it?
" Yes.
" Maybe he could help my little sister with her trigonometry, she told him.
" Trigonometry?
" Yes, I couldn't. And my husband is worse than me when it comes to mathematics. Besides, I am not good at explaining things anyway.
" Teaching is a profession, Sadi retorted, then added, " I'll ask him if he can help.
" He'll agree, he is a very nice young man, always trying to be helpful.
" I am not surprised. He wanted to be angel when he was young boy. He didn't know that they were created just as they are. He thought maybe there were things he could do to become one. You know, like one day he'd graduate to be an angel.
" Really?
" I am serious.
" That's fantastic.
"Well, he can be very imaginative.
" I am going to tease him about that when he comes.
" He laughs at himself these days when we remind him of that, Sadi told her.
" He'll probably be wearing that cap of his. The green one with a picture of a young a baby on it
" He just loves that. Goes with it anywhere. Mama gave it to him, Sadi told her.
" He is such a nice young man. You are too. I think it's in your family. In the genes.
" Thank you. At least you appreciate.

Forty five minutes were left and the shift would be over. They had slept now and then for hours. In turn. The radio was totally quiet, and it seemed like the whole world was silent. Nothing moved.
" Well, it looks like another night has passed safely, Mili said drowsily.
" Can we say enjoy this job?
" I don't know.
" Because it might mean we like accidents to happen, Sadi speculated.
" It's just like police, judges and almost everybody else. Every job is there because there something not pleasant that's happening and it has to be taken care of, Mili said.
" You are right. I guess I didn't really do a job, but I am glad that the night is over.
" You waited, that's good also. You were on the alert. Should be proud of that.
" I am proud of that.
" You going back to your lovely, but kind of mean, girlfriend?
" She is not home, gone to Arusha for work, Sadi informed her.
" I guess you are free.
" It's very strange, I don't like the way she handles some things, yet I just can't live without her.
" That's love. It's intriguing, like a lovely little puzzle that you can't really solve, Mili remarked, then added, " I am going to my husband. The first thing he'll tell me is about something that happened in the night while I was gone. Trying to make me feel guilty of what I do.
" You must really know him.
" Just like your girlfriend, he annoys and he pleases me, Mili said.
He took out a knife from his pocket and an orange from one of the drawers. He always walked with that knife. He said it was in case of an emergency. And the emergency always seemed to be an orange. Sadi just loved oranges. It didn't matter what time it was or where. Most of the time he had them stored somewhere.
" Some orange juice? He asked holding an orange to her.
" Please. She could use a fruit in this early morning.

It was thirty minutes to go when the radio buzzed.
" Traffic car accident, reportedly three people on the scene. Not good, at least from the caller's point of view. Rwagasore Street.
They looked at each other. Just when they were about to finish the shift, they thought.
They responded to the radio announcer and got in the car.

" Just when we thought our night was over, here comes an afterthought before we go, Mili said.

In a few seconds they were cruising through the streets of the city of Mwanza, polluting the calm night with sounds of the blaring siren. The place was not very far away. They knew they'd be there in a few minutes. She was the driver. He just sat on the side enjoying the fresh breeze that came right from the shores of the Lake Victoria. It was a little humid, the breeze.
Ten minutes and they had reached the scene. A quick glance even before they got out of the car informed them the situation definitely was not good. Whoever made the call to the emergency service was right. Two cars were compressed into one another. The shapes were gone, the streamlines were now a mess.
Quickly they got out of the ambulance.
Mili went to one of the car. There was a person inside, trapped.
Sadi went to the other one and there were two people inside.
He made a rapid check up on one of them and decided he was dead. Just as he was finishing up, she came to the opposite side to check the other person. From the sight it was obvious he was dead. The green cap the man was wearing was all soaked in blood. He had bled too much, and from the head. She had to make sure though, she knew of cases where a live man was taken to the morgue only to wake up scaring the heck out of workers.
She made the tests and looked at Sadi.
" Dead, she announced, " one is alive in the other. He is drunk though.

She quickly got up to go back to the live one in the other car.
He looked at the dead man and then at the other one. Life had been taken away. He felt sad and sorry for them. He decided he should go to help her with the one who was at least breathing. Sadi knew he was the culprit of this mess. He was driving under the influence.
He sighed and got up. He started walking away. He saw her trying to figure a way of getting the man out.
He was walking, then all of a sudden he froze. He had seen something. Something in the wrecked car where the two bodies laid quiet. He turned to walk back to the car.
" Hey, just hold on a little, I am trying to get you out of there, she told the man in the car.
" Hurry up, lady. I don't have all day to be in here.
" Where are you going?
" I don't know. I am just getting around.
Sadi came to the window of the car. It was broken and he slowly slipped his hand into the front. He took the hand of the dead body. Covered in blood he looked at it for a long moment, trying hard to make it not true. He looked at the shirt as his eyes started to get red. Then he looked at the green cap. The picture of a young baby was barely recognizable underneath the stains of blood.
Then he stared at his face. He had to. He took out his handkerchief, but it was not for his tears. He started wiping the blood from the man's face.
" Okay, man. I think I just know how to get you out of there, she said.
The door of the back seemed just possible to be opened. She'd get in through the back and pull him from there. She started pulling it, but it was trapped. She saw the place it was trapped and it wasn't much, but she could really use help from Sadi.
" Sadi, she called.
He didn't respond.
She called again. He hadn't heard, she thought.
And again.
She turned to look at him and screamed, " Hey, they are dead. There is nothing much we can do for them. Come let us help this one.
He didn't even seem to have heard, now he his face flooded with tears. The hand of the dead man in his.
She glanced at the man in the car and then at Sadi.
This was not usual. It was not his first time to meet dead people, in fact he had been doing this for years. He was very professional, what had happened today? What had made him break down?
" Hey, you. Don't be acting stupid, I could die here. Don't you hear your partner calling you to help? Those are dead.
" Shut up.
" You can't tell me to shut up. It's your job to save me. If I die, it's your fault. And you know what? If I die, I will kill you. Yeah, that's right, I will kill you too.
She shook his head at his stupidity.
" Sadi, she called.
This time he turned to look at her. She saw his face. She was shocked. This definitely was not normal.
She started to go to him.
" Hey, you too are leaving me now. You are going to loose your job you know. I am going to fire you myself. I am the boss you know. Everyone you see around is my employee.
" Shut up. For all I know you are drunk and you have brought this on yourself. And then you make me sick. We could just as well leave you here to die. In fact we don't care about you.
" Like I said, you can't tell me to shut up. It's my mouth. And what is that that you said? I didn't really see it, I mean I didn't really hear it.
She was disgusted. She quickly went to him,
" Hey Sadi, what is it?
He just broke down.
" They are dead. We can help him though.
He didn't say anything, just cried even more. He turned to look at her and then turned to look at the dead man. His face now a little clear after he cleaned it with handkerchief. She turned also. She saw it. She was stupefied. Horrified. She struggled to keep herself calm.
She turned to him. For a moment she couldn't say anything.
Then she mustered, "Sadi, I am so sorry.
She pulled him to her. She could hear the roar of the tears coming out of his eyes and soon she could feel her own wetting her cheeks.
" I am so sorry.
" Why? Why? He asked.
" I don't know. And she really didn't know.
" Hey, you two, what's up with all that hugging? You have decided to make a love scene now, while I could be dying here? Besides, there is nothing like real love between two human beings. A man can only love one thing, and that is beer. Come up here and get me loose.
" Don't listen to him, she told him. The man was making her angry and she feared it might be more than anger for Sadi. He might be a cool and a quiet man, but he was only human. In fact he was known to explode sometimes. She held him stronger, she couldn't let him loose and unleash the death for the drunk trapped guy.
" He'll be ok, Sadi. God has received him in His Home.
" I hope so.
" He'll be ok.
" Maybe he has already met with some angels.
" That is without a doubt.
She continued holding him.

" You just stay here, I'll go and deal with him.
He didn't answer anything.
She was angry as she got up. She was wondering what was the right thing to do. The man was the one who was supposed to be dead. She thought about leaving the area. Nobody would care. After all, this was Tanzania. Once you were dead, nobody investigated. Not even the insurance company because they are not planning on paying anybody.
She came to the wreck again.
" Are you serious? I thought love is not allowed at work, the man spoke.
" You are disgusting, you know that?
" I am not so sure I know, my brain is not getting enough blood because you two are wasting time. Now why is your friend not coming?
" You know what? You don't deserve our help. Especially not his, he is just a volunteer.
" I don't care, he said, then screamed, " Hey you, don't make me mad at you. Come and help your mistress get me out of here, or I'll come and get you. You hear me, you fool? I have a party to go to.
" You know, if I were you I'd be quiet, if not begging for his mercy. You have just killed his younger brother and I can assure I am shocked he hasn't come up here and finish you off right there while you are helpless. I knew I would have.
" Get out of here.
And then it seemed the words had began to register in his slowly perceiving brain.
" You mean, there was his brother in that car.
" A man doesn't just cry. That's one he is crying over.
" I didn't know, he won't help, will he?
All of a sudden he was fearful. Not only was he helpless while trapped in that wrecked car but his life depended on a person whose brother he had just killed.
They turned to look at him. He was up now and was coming towards them.
She looked carefully at him. She was worried. There was no telling what was going on his head at the moment. He looked at his hands. He had a knife in his hands.
She glanced at the man in the car, he was even more scared.
She would not interfere this. If Sadi was going to chop the man's head off, she would let him. A little protest and she could be slaughtered too. This was no place to act diplomatic. Innocent life had been taken away by an irresponsible drunk driver.
Sadi's face was sad and angry, she noticed. She held her breath and made a prayer to the One who had taken his brother. The man tried to shake himself free, but he couldn't. It was too painful and he was weak. The loss of blood was taking it's toll. He rested and let himself watch what would happen. Sadi was close now, the knife firmly in his right hand grip. She just finished the prayer, but she started again. The man's eyes were remorseful as he watched him approach.

" Hold the top part, and we'll pull together on the count to three, he said when he had reached the car and did something with door lock with the knife.
She watched him, for a moment not responding. She wasn't sure she had heard him correctly.
" Watch out for the broken glass window, he added, putting the knife back in his pocket.
***
The man opened his eyes. He couldn't see anything. It was totally dark. He thought for a moment, then it became clear to him. It was not night. He was just dead. Yes, he was dead. Hell was dark. That's what the preacher had always said in his sermons. There was fire and yet it was dark. How else could he explain the darkness? He was dead. It was the injection that man had given him. He had had revenge on him for killing his brother.
Then all of a sudden he heard a sound. A flood of light came in. A door had been opened. Was it a angel coming from heaven? Or maybe a demon from hell! Then another light turned on. It was a switch. Then weakly he saw a person. She went to the window and opened the curtains. There was a faint light added.
She came towards him, " Good morning, mister.
" Good morning.
" I am Saint Mary, I'll be taking care of you while you are here in this place.
" What?
" I said I am nurse Mary and I'll be taking care of you while you are here. You were involved in a car accident.
" Oh, he said in his mind.
Now, he was alive. He wasn't hearing properly though. Where did the Saint come from? Must have been the accident. Or maybe the fear.
" I know, he said.

He looked around. Things started to register in his mind. He was in the hospital. He stared out of the window. The sun was already appearing. He was amazed at the speed with which it came up. The beauty of the color that proceeded from the golden red circle was just breathtaking. How come he had never seen that before?
He recalled the previous day. The man had helped his partner to get him out of the wrecked car and they had attended him before putting him on the stretcher. Next thing he remembered was that he was in the back of the ambulance going somewhere. He was getting weaker and weaker. Then he saw him taking out a syringe. He stuck it into the bottle and drew some liquid. Then he brought it towards him. He wished he could stop him, but he couldn't. His strength was all gone from him. He just recalled thinking, what a cruel man? He had gone through the trouble of getting him out of the car, only to kill him in the ambulance with the chemicals that were supposed to give life to people.
Very sweet revenge, the man thought. He gave him hope and just when he thought he would live, he would kill him. Then the syringe was sunk into his flesh. He started to feel dizzy and light. He could do nothing about it. He passed out. He was dying, he knew.
As he looked back now, he realized probably that was the injection that saved his life. The guilt could have killed him at that moment. It wasn't easy being taken care of by a person whom he had killed his brother. And then here it was again. The guilt.
The man who had saved him was just remarkable, he thought.
A door opened again. Mili came in this time.
" Good morning.
" Good morning, he said.
" How are you doing?
" I think I am okay.
" Good. I just wanted to check out how you are recovering.
" Where is he? His name is Sadi I think. That's what I recall you calling him the other night
" Yes, that's his name. He doesn't want to see you.
" He saved me and he doesn't want to see me? The man asked.
" I think he is afraid he could loose his temper and kill you.
" I don't blame him though. I can understand it. I did a terrible thing.
She looked at him. She didn't want to say anything more.
" I'll see you
She started walking away.
" Hey, please give him my thanks. And please tell him I am deeply sorry. It's only too bad that I can do nothing.
" Surely you can't. I'll give him your message. He is gone to prepare for the funeral now.
" It's all my fault.
" He asked me why?
" What did you say.
" I didn't know.
" I wonder why I survived myself? I was the cause of it all. I should have died.
" You know, I think he could come to see you one day.
" I hope, but I wonder if I can myself bear to stand in front of him.
" That's understandable. What I still don't understand though is how he managed to do what he did yesterday? I would have killed you.
" Actually I thought he was going to kill me. When he was coming with the knife, and then when he injected with some medication, I suppose. I woke up this morning thinking I was dead and I was in hell.
She laughed a little.
" You are lucky my friend. I think I am also lucky to be working with him, she said.
" We definitely are.
" Got go.
" Please tell him I thank him and I am sorry.
" I told you I will tell him.
" Ok. Hey and thank you too.
" You are welcome.
" And thanks for coming by.
" You are welcome again.
She was soon gone.
He was thinking, he would never be same.
He will have to do something that someone, not necessarily the whole world, but at least just one person, was going to remember him for.
He was going to be good. And he would never drink again. Or at least not drink and drive.

THE END.