The fugative part 3

Winston decided to think so he went down the streets of Cornwall
trying to think and decide hat was next.
In a dark corner he saw a door, when he saw this door his first
instinct was to walk away, but after thinking it though changed his
mind.
He had already turned the handle to see a small solitary patch of
grass. It was like a small hiding place in a small deserted street. The
area was a straight box like design of a patch of grass.
He could now sit and think. Today was his ultimatum for him. He was
comfortable in his own skin. He wasn't so insignificant today. He
walked into the spot calmly and could now mediate. Why didn't he just
go back to college?
He begun to look in his backpack it contained a few CD's and a novel of
an insane asylum, it also contained his diary. While listening to his
music he wrote his latest thoughts and opinions In his diary.
"Yesterday I was disappointed to come to such a dump and hey what a
surprise, no one me. Do I regret the amount of money I've stolen? NO
not in the slightest I was right to do it.
If I don't get enough of what I want then I will spread my wings and go
where I want to go.
Actually I need more money, oh god this is terrible I'm making a huge
mistake I need money not this stupid idea of popularity. Well yesterday
I went on this bus and just sat looking out of a window.
I don't know how long for all I know is that I couldn't even
contemplate going back. I was there I got to this really strange place
where there was only a streetlight and a few houses. It was so
expensive and yet so empty.
I searched into the dead of night for somewhere to go and all I could
was that expensive, ugly and deserted motel I still don't regret
leaving as I don't regret anything. Anyway I got a room, slept and am
now really depressed. Maybe I do regret going, you see I still want to
be a MOVIE STAR in capital letters. I guess that's what I want
The entry for that day was the 20th of August 5 days before his 20th
birthday.