Dull Ache Writing

There's days that I can't write
and I'll face my computer,
my stomach churning and loosening
for something to come up.
But it remains a dry retch,
full out onto the keyboard -
imaginary vomit crawling over the keys,
more puke all over the monitor screen.
I need my food, I need to read
and research and look with my eyes,
at photo's and letters and clippings,
books and words - but none are mine.