Used to be in love

Making pie crust promises to myself. Easily made..even easier to be
broken.

Tinkering with all these feelings I have.
Setting the good ones to the side and shoving the bad ones to the
back.

Smiling as big as I can to make my cheeks pink and full to hide my
teary eyes.

Smiling even though the tears still run down my face no matter what I
do.

I used to be in love.

Smelling my own hair while hiding behind it. It smells of comfort.
Me.
The only one I can trust.
My mirror holds a fake reflection.
Feels like I'm running in sand.
Unable to go anywhere.

I used to love so deep.

The words run like watercolors now.
Pretty inked up blotches of meaningless nothings.
Heart tissue hanging.
Head hanging.
Liquid crystals falling.

You have left me here.

All said and done. I am left alone with myself.
My suicidal self.
My emotional hell.

All I do is weep.

Stagnant insides. My rotton guts.
My bloody tear ducts.

I used to be in love.

I used to love so deep.

You have left me here.

All I do is weep.

ASMHAIZ*)? Copyright 2001